First Person Past Simple and You

The art of writing is fraught, as critics, holding the writer responsible, are almost entirely negative, blaming for substance, and content, if it mars their contentment. Viewers, similarly, are critical to the point of the speakers of the words in a movie being accursed; for what they say.

Fig. 1 'Pig glut.'

 Director of The Exorcist (1973), from William Peter Blatty's screenplay of his 1971 novel (see fig. 1), David Friedkin, wrote and directed Cruising (1980), based on Gerald Walker’s 1970 novel about the slaying of gay men, but inspired by real-life ‘bag murders’ of six homosexuals (1975-7), centering upon Greenwich Village, New York city, unprovenly associated with 1979's convicted murderer, Paul, 'Johnny Johnson', Bateson. Appearing as a radiologic technologist in The Exorcist, renowned for its bloodiness, after Friedkin watched him perform a genuine cerebral angiography at NYU Medical Center, as a preliminary to surgical invasion, Bateson is an instance of persona-behavior identification syndrome, where the actor’s persona, as a character, developed as an infectiousness affecting his behavior.

 In The Exorcist, 13 years Linda Blair, as demoniacally possessed Regan MacNeil, has her carotid artery punctured, as a part of the medical procedure to examine her brain, while Bateson reassures her, as blood spurts up into the air, before staining her surgical gown. Although signs of persona-behavior suppression are difficult to discern, Blair's subsequent career was determined, for example, in Hell Night (1981) her character, Marti Gaines, survives a mass murder. The killer(s) of NY's gay men, irrespective of whether Bateson was the murderer, dismembered the bodies, and as it was still their bag, threw them in bags into the Hudson river at the Villagers' western border.

 Modern critics are ‘carping criticism’; unwarranted and/or malicious. In the early days of Hollywood, Los Angeles, west coast California state, center of the US' mass media Empire, Louella Parsons, screenwriter, for example, with The Magic Wand (1912), had a ‘sweetness and light’ style, which made her an unrivalled ‘gossip columnist’, celebrative of others' idiosyncrasies, until former actress, famous for her portrayal of 'society women' (see fig. 2), Hedda Hopper, for example, in the silent film, Virtuous Wives (1918), became a proponent of the ‘blacklist’ for stars deemed by herself and others, ‘Un-American’, at The Los Angeles Times from 1937, with a style, defined by some as ‘crass’, making it difficult to separate art from life.

Fig. 2 Virtuous Wives (1918)

 There resulted a schizophrenic ‘split’, between public face and private person, where criticism became a device to make the public persona identical with the private person’s behavior; ensuring stars were flattened by ‘TV critics’. Until they became blamable, one-dimensional characters, indistinguishable from what was written for, or about them. A direct consequence of Hopper's agenda, stars were 'outed' on the basis of her opinion, as homosexuals or communists, for example, until they were out of Hollywood; or, forced to adopt false persona-behavior patterns, commensurate with being alienated by spies, who wanted them to live blind to what they could have had and been. 

While English verb tenses with pronouns can be difficult, semantically, for learners, especially second language acquirers, to comprehend, a large part of the curse, associated with the narrative relating of stories, is that eyes are associated with the ego, that is, the ‘I’ of the first person singular, while ‘the objective correlative’,1 to use a literary analytical term from American poet T. S. Eliot's essay, ‘Hamlet and His Problems’ (1919), is the second person singular, which bears the weight of being contextually understandable to English language learners, as the plural is also ‘you’, which so far as the Prince of Denmark (PoD) is concerned in the drama, Hamlet (1599-1601), written by the English playwright, William Shakespeare, is about how the multiple egos of the audience (eyes) use the accusative, declined; us, me, him, whom, and them, in its condemnation of a fratricidal coward: ‘Thus conscience does make cowards of us all, and thus the native hue of resolution is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought, and enterprises of great pitch and moment with this regard their currents turn awry and lose the name of action.'2

Fig. 3 Butchered by the usual shower

 Although the actor, evincing the anguish and madness of Hamlet on stage, or screen, for example, Ethan Hawke in Hamlet 2000 (2000), isn't guilty of fratricide, he's tainted by association. Anthony Perkins is always Norman Bates at the motel, where he kills Janet Leigh, in her role as Marion Crane (see fig. 3), in the Psycho (1960) shower scene, whereas it’s you, the audience, that’s responsible, as in ancient Greek dramatist, Sophocles, Oedipus Rex (c. 429 B.C.). Oedipus, who’s killed his father, and married his mother, is lame, and has blinded himself, signifying the ego's occlusion, as Jesus' was, because it’s what you (pl.) vicariously wanted. Although the actor on stage, or screen, isn’t actually lame or blind, it's the accusative amongst the audience's curse upon him. While the audience have only bought a ticket, the performer's defence is contractual, which can’t be axe murderer Patrick Bateman’s excuse in the movie, American Psycho (2000), based on Brett Easton Ellis’ 1991 novel, although the actor in the role, Christian Bale, stands accusingly by the box office. 

 The fate of Manhattan ‘bag murderer’, Bateson, is an indication that persona-behavior identification is a real issue for performers cursed by the accusative, as accusers progressively cripple and blind. As Shakespeare's Lady Macbeth, is a character, 'Out damned spot!' (V, i, l. 31) she isn't a person who can rid herself of the stain of murder, which is a written behavior pattern, rather than that the actress is accursed, whereas that’s how she’s perceived by the paying audience; receiving payment as a murderess: 'Here's the smell of the blood still. All the perfumes of Arabia will not sweeten this little hand.'3

 As all Shakespeare’s characters were perforce acted by men, as women weren’t permitted to act, during the reign of queen Elizabeth I, persona-behavior psychopathology was established as an institution within English drama, which served as an accusative curse upon women, as the audience unconsciously agree that acting is how people actually are. If God’s to be appealed to, as a matter of curse, it's according to the crucifixion of Jesus ‘Christ’, ‘the chosen’, ‘This is my son in whom I am well pleased.’ (Matt: 3. 17) The accusative amongst the audience, that is, you (collectively) erred, in having Jesus taken to Calvary hill, outside Jerusalem, during the occupation of Jewish Palestine by the Romans, in the name of the Emperor Tiberius (14-37 C.E.), where, if only in front of Tib's eyes by proxy, Jesus, nailed to a cross of wood, died there.

Fig. 4 The lamb of God

 Jesus' Resurrection and Ascension to heaven broke the accusative audience’s curse, who wanted torture and extinction, whereas the actor wasn’t contractually obligated. Useful for English language learners, unsure of the differences, between second person singular, and second person plural, to comprehend. Jesus' disciple, Judas, gave Jesus to the Jewish religious police, the Pharisees, who tried and executed him through Roman judge, Pontius Pilate, as Judas had found Jesus with a woman, that is, a singular second person, ‘Leave her alone.’ (Mk: 14. 6) Jesus, second person singular, became plural in the minds of the accusative, acting according to developmental psychologist, Carl Jung (1875-1961), as a collective, projecting their shadow, while the individual, Jesus, appealed to the second person plural, ‘Love your neighbor as you love yourself.’ (Mk: 12. 31) Killed in the accusative, that is, by them, Jesus was their shadow.

 As Dror Ben Ami observed, ‘… the blood sacrifice of Jesus was a more effective way to remove sins [than animals] ...'4 Ami errs in suggesting human sacrifice is good. For Jung, the personal shadow of the individual, requires integration to render it harmless, that is, the foundless perception of another person as inferior is, rather, an indication of the perceiver's inferiority. As the shadow is in large part instinct, Jesus was killed by a collective, operating at the level of animal consciousness, who believed that to have her as their slave, Jesus must be cut away from the woman, emphasized by Judas' kissing Jesus full on the mouth, in sterilizing treachery. From the point of view of the shadow projected, that is, the accusative, more animals like Jesus are needed. That such sacrifice removes sin is Ami's error. The killing of Jesus was the collective sin, which curse Jesus' Resurrection broke. He was escaping slavery. Elsewise, human sacrifice is a simpler evil.

Fig. 5 ‘Yaroo!’

 In the tetragrammaton, YHWH, comprised of Hebrew language vowels, Jehovah's pronounced, 'You.' The second person plural of the Old Testament, as the collective, deciding to kill the second person singular, is God, that is, YHWH (YOU), but Jesus' Resurrection signifies he isn't you (pl.) from the perspective of Christians. A collective that believed it was YHWH (God) erred, and the Jewish 'dissenter', Jesus, was made to fit the worship form category of animal sacrifice. 

 In Shakespeare's English, second person singular, that is, thou, thee, thy, and thine, etc., is distinct from second person plural, as ewes (youse) die, that is, in war the flocks of the congregations of the Christian churches are the sheep of animal sacrifice, directed by their dogs of war, collared or unfrocked, while the shepherds are made to see the efficacy in that, as a solution to the problem of the Old Testament collective, who in killing Jesus, that is, as the second person singular, didn't understand they were killing God, as the second person plural. In terms of Christian consciousness, they're ewe (pl.) led astray, rather than thou; individually distinct. God's acknowledgment of 'the lamb' (see fig. 4), Jesus, is that of consubstantiality, which is a unity of second person singular, and second person plural, that is, togetherness, which is the third person singular, 'one,' used as a 'friendship determiner' to confer consubstantiality; ostensibly upon those Christians who followed Jesus' teaching thereafter, 'You believe that there is one God. Good!' (James: 2. 19)

 It's a speech form used in English fee-paying public schools, for example, at Harrow and Eton, sixth formers (lower and upper), during the period set for taking 'A' (Advanced) level exams, in contradistinction to 'O' (Ordinary) level, which students are prepared for from primary school level, traditionally call themselves 'gods', while the Os are 'fags', that is, they have to do things for them, like a Microsoft OS for PCs, which means they're short of breath and anxious,5 as if suffering from severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS), or fear of AIDS.

 As a god one has breathless fags, like children's writer Charles Hamilton's fictional creature, Billy Bunter of Greyfriars (see fig. 5), written in the nom de plume, Frank Richards, 1908-65, who weren't one, whereas one had friends, amongst the other gods, perhaps, who were, 'Would you?' Pagan slavery isn't characterized by belief in God as One, that is, the third person singular, as you isn’t, while such usage does determine Christian relationships, 'For there is one God and one mediator between God and mankind, the man Christ Jesus.' (Tim: 2. 5)

 In Christianity, father, son, and Holy Spirit, are consubstantial; One. While human sacrifice is forbidden, as God, as the third, and second person, singular and plural, lives as One. In the book of Numbers, a man, caught collecting firewood on Saturday, set aside as the Jews' day of rest, was killed by God, ‘Give the man the death penalty. Yes, kill him, the whole community hurling stones at him outside the camp.’ (Num: 15. 35) As the second person singular, the man is killed by the first person singular, that is, God as YHWH (you), after the application of the accusative, that is, him, not me, as applied by the accusers, us, who in denying the man's second person singular consubstantiality with God, as understood by the Christians, sacrificed the firewood collector, as Jesus was similarly killed for teaching on Saturday.

 It isn't a paradox, as Jesus' teaching supersedes the Old Testament of Judaism for Christians. God isn't the same curmudgeon, who wants to live a dictatorial existence, as Jesus' execution transformed God's first person singularity, as YHWH (you) into acceptance of second person plurality. Whereas people had been characters, that is, non persons, like Lady Macbeth, who couldn't rid herself of the stain of murder, the possibility of God's acceptance of 3-D people, as consubstantial, held the promise not only of Jesus' salvation, but also those who were persona-behavior cursed, like murderer Paul Bateson, infected by his role in The Exorcist; a movie about demoniacal possession.

 For Christian English teachers, required to work on Sunday, which is their day of rest, it's relevant, as religious extremists might believe they're justified in killing one accusingly. Amongst Moslems of the nations of Islam, it's Friday, where Sharia law, applied to stone (see fig. 6) teenage girls, Hasna, 17, and Madiha, 16, in the city of Deir Ezzor,6 eastern Syria, for being with men, demands recognition of the illegal legitimacy that Moslems, Jews, Christians, Satanists, and soccer hooligans, etc., claim for killing each other over sacred cows. 

Fig. 6 Woman being punished; forgetting: stoned

 The simple past tense of the verb, 'to be', as applied to both singular and plural second person, indicates significant degeneration in importance accorded to you, since Shakespeare. Simple extinguishment, as if animal(s), by the past simple form with the second person, is symptomatic of human sacrifice, that is, were; be past simply. From the slavers' point of view, Jesus was killed by his accusatives as a too helpful animal. While Christians identify themselves as a plurality, that is, One with God, the abandonment of thou, thee, thy, and thine, as second person singular, in favor of the universal you, for second person plural also, invokes the simply past tense, was/were, which is death sentencing in accusative paganism, for example, 'You were teaching on Sunday?’ The significance accorded to the second person singular needs universality, ‘One was.’ Without consubstantiality with God, as the second person plural, and the third person singular, Jesus is dead; simply past. That God is One is a means to communicate the fact that one isn’t permitted to kill the teacher.

Fig. 7 Laurence Olivier; Henry V (1944)

 The ego can't comment on the demise of the ego, which is for ‘other’ eyes, individual or collective, to remark upon. However, as it’s always you that dies, that's the objective of the sacrificer. You, not I, is the first person singular principle of human sacrifice towards the simple second person singular, who’s an enslaved fag, for example, understood by the sacrificer to be an animal, before it's killed, which is the reason they call Christians sheep, given the more creatively rewarding ways of caring for oneself, rather than being a slave of husbandry. While priests wear sheep dog collars, responsible for shepherding flocks to slaughterhouse war zones, the fags are finally, as in Shakespeare's drama of the English king's battle at Agincourt (1415), northern France (see fig. 7), Henry V (c. 1599), breathlessly, smoked in the line of fire: 'Once more unto the breech, dear friends, once more; or close the wall up with our English dead.'7 The 'fag gods' (faggots) junior roast, as logs in front of fires, at public boarding school, inside private rooms, institutionalize, through panic attacks, the weakening of the human system, for enslavement in fears of the AIDS gods' of homosexuality's SARS related virus.

 If God, as one, is third person singular, and plural, and you, second person singular, and plural, as a Christian in acceptance of the spirit of Jesus' teaching, like Valentine observes, preacher in sci-fi novelist Robert Heinlein's (1907-88) Stranger In A Strange Land (1961), '... when a cat stalks a sparrow both of them are God, carrying out God's thoughts.'8 While the human sacrificer doesn't mind it's you, as his god wants your blood, for both teachers and students, life's spent in the pursuit of teaching others and learning; like Jesus'.

1 Eliot, T. S. ‘Hamlet and His Problems’ (1919), The Sacred Wood: Essays on Poetry and Criticism, 1920, pp. 55-9.

2 Shakespeare, William, Hamlet, Act III, Scene i, l. 90-5, c. 1599-1601.

3 Shakespeare, William, Macbeth, Act V, Scene i, l. 31; 44-6, c. 1603/6.

4 Ami, Dror Ben ‘Metaphors in the Torah: The Roles of Blood and the Liver in Removing Sin’, The Jerusalem Post, https://www.jpost.com/Blogs/Torah-Commentaries/Metaphors-in-the-Torah-The-Role-of-the-Blood-and-the-Liver-in-Removing-Sin-390469 , February 10th, 2015, 18:57 pm. 

5 Healy, Melissa ‘Did failure to adequately treat HIV patients give rise to the Omicron [SARS] variant?’, Los Angeles Times, https://www.latimes.com/science/story/2021-12-02/did-omicron-coronavirus-variant-arise-in-patient-with-uncontrolled-hiv , December 2nd, 2021, 4 am Pacific Time (PT).

6 Logan, Russ 'Isis 'stones to death two teenage girls accused of adultery in Syria', https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/isis-stones-to-death-two-teenage-girls-accused-of-adultery-in-syria-a6898256.html , February 26th, 2016, Friday, 17:34 pm. 

7 Shakespeare, William Henry V, Act III, Scene i, l. 1-2, c. 1599.

8 Heinlein, Robert A. Stranger In A Strange Land, Part Five, 'His Happy Destiny', Ch. XXXVI, Ace Books: New York, 1961, p. 564.

Explaining English Gobbledygook to In Indonesian

Being asked recently to do some ‘black work’ online, that is, for cash, to maintain body and soul, for 100 GBP a month, by a ‘colleague’, asking if the flat couldn’t be left in a will? It wasn’t only illuminating to look at alternatives to salaried economics. The issue is time consumption. Justifying salary paid, on the basis of time consumed, and the time consumed by students, in completing the tasks set for them to do, is the usual basis of a value for money (VFM) salary economic for teachers. However, quantity, rather than quality, is generally determined as insufficiency, as it isn’t of a personal dimension, so immeasurably inadequate from the perspective of both employers and students, who’re then in the position of enslavers.

 In managerial terms, managers manage. Whereas those who’re concerned with personal approaches towards students expect to be vindicated when the teacher is too impersonal, that’s generally a sign of professionalism in English language teaching, rather than toadying, which is demonstrating being a slave to a slaver to safeguard slavery. The trend in ‘live’ on demand public appearances, with ‘selfie’ photographs of applicants, self-taken with a camera lens, mounted on a personal ‘phone that requires someone else to ‘take charge’ of their ‘personal space’, or more elaborately set up ‘phone links to websites, like WhatsApp, etc., using a QR code scanner, so the ‘phone wielder can check their hair on the ‘phone, while standing in front of the laptop camera, before setting the ‘phone down, and taking a photo using an automatic time-delay mechanism, is a rather queer adjunct to basic serfdom.

 Skype, and Zoom, along with WhatsApp interviews, etc., are aimed at furthering presenters, rather than teachers, and presentation rather than content, which might be okay, if all employment was that of a receptionist, but it isn’t. During the severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) epidemic, people were subjected to ‘phone terror, with lives dependent on the whim of sim card operators, for example, Vodafone, and T-Mobile, etc., whose websites mightn’t be ‘up’ for a debit card transaction, so a ‘take charge’ by someone else in a QR, ‘queer code’ arrangement, was made perforce acceptable to the fiercely independent; or else a top up by ATM in the mid-winter could signal lung failure, if a phone stand hadn’t been purchased by the pensioner, who also needed a degree in computer science to set the time delay mechanism on their ‘smartphone’ camera, before rushing in front of the lens to get a mugshot to accord with the demands of the healthcare provider wanting a verified ID to make out a prescription for insulin, for example. That a presenter is perceived as the best teacher, because they’re a user, not only unhealthily equates the applicant for the insulin with the fascist perspective that the fittest survive, but suggests that the professional teacher is unfit, as they aren’t an adequate tab user.

 Although the objective of those advocating personal input is meant to demonstrate sociability and societal care and cohesion, in fact it’s based on vindication, that is, slavers are vindicated by those who feel cared for, whereas old age pensioner didn’t feel vindication in their need to have a ‘phone and a laptop to take a ‘selfie’, as they wanted an appointment at the local health center, and neither do the teachers feel vindicated by the QR (queer) code. Requiring people to take mugshots of themselves is rather vindictive of muggers, who want to mug their victims, rather than an indication of righteous action. Identifying ‘people at risk’, through requiring them to show IDs, is a sign of justified thieving, and teachers overseas aren’t aware that they’re similarly unprotected.

 Giving up on getting PayPal to comply with their client’s need to withdraw money for the ‘phone, after successfully completing the request for ticking the number of motorcycles in the Captcha ‘game’, to see who can access their own account, after the password has been given, which PayPal have required to be changed at least a hundred times to ‘safeguard identity’, that puts a more than usual strain on failing memory, and they’re now going to send a verification code by SMS to the ‘phone that needs to be topped up, so that the client can input that too, as long as they’ve fulfilled the requirement of buying a ‘phone to go with their personal computer (laptop, tablet, etc.), but there’s then a request from the ‘bank’ to tick the number of sailing boats in the Captcha, and the ‘phone can’t receive the SMS because it hasn’t any credit, is what the vindictive do with people, who won’t die, and give up their homes and possessions to the ‘dealer’.

 Indonesian students, at a university, were asked to upload work to be reviewed, and graded on Padlet; a cloud-based software-as-a-service company, hosted from the company’s headquarters in the city of San-Francisco, state of California, United States of America, and from the city-state island of Singapore, maritime Southeast Asia. A real-time collaborative web platform, Padlet users upload, organize, and share content through virtual bulletin boards, called ‘padlets’. Given a rubric to understand, along with the teachers, who were asked to assess, and mark the tasks uploaded by the students, according to the requirements, it consumed a lot of time, especially as the rubric might as well have been in Chinese for the native English speakers, and some of them were.

 Masquerading as education, it was in fact time-wasting to slave. The Indonesian students paid for their time to be wasted, and the university paid the teachers to waste their time. As the students paid, the objective was to waste as much time as possible for as long as possible, while making it appear as if education was being given to satisfy parents, for example; who may’ve simply been rich enough to force their children to work there, rather than educate a rival future generation, who mightn’t want to be slaved, and perhaps mightn’t even have wanted to be slavers. That the teachers were ridden like animals by line managers with whips is merely an aspect of slavery’s vindictiveness, while the ostensibly worked for qualification is the vindication of the slaver exercising their personal animosity against the intelligent, who’d prefer to be able to communicate what’s within their understanding, as they aren’t, generally speaking, cryptography literate.

 There were four task components, according to the rubric given to the students, as below, who if they could puzzle would be able to glean what was required in order to pass, which may’ve been of some moment to them, but the impenetrable disguise adopted by the course setters made it easier to simply do as much as possible and hope for a hit, for example, all Tasks marked with an asterisk * had to be completed to get a pass mark, 10 or above. While the above 10 category doesn’t seem immediately relevant, there are also 13 compulsory Tasks, with the stipulation that at least 9 out of 12, because it was confusingly amended to 12, rather than the 13 according to the rubric printed as a hand out, as well as all * Tasks, must be completed for a pass mark, that is, 10, and there are 6 additional Tasks, of which 3 must be completed, as well as all * Tasks, and all now 12 compulsory tasks, for a pass mark between 13 and 20, which is the highest mark attainable. Apart from that, there are an apparently unlimited number of self-study Tasks, which when completed, together with all of the * Tasks and all of the 12 compulsory Tasks, and at least 4 of the additional Tasks, if the week 12 summary of a paragraph on Technical Fascism, with uploaded paragraph and notes, are completed, a score of 17 or above is attainable:

• Tasks [4]

• All * Tasks Must be completed for your padlet to be awarded a Pass mark (10 or above)
• Compulsory Tasks (13)
• A minimum of 9/12 (as well as all * Tasks) MUST be completed for a Pass mark (10 or above)
• Additional Tasks [6]
• At least three pf the Additional Tasks (as well as all * Tasks and all Compulsory Tasks) MUST be completed for a score of 13/20 or above
• Self-Study [?]
• Some extra Self-Study Tasks (as well as all * Tasks, all Compulsory Tasks, and at least 4 of the Additional Tasks, INCLUDING the week 12 summary of a paragraph on ‘Technical Fascism’, with uploaded original paragraph, and your notes, must be completed for a score of 17 or above

 That the marks are out of 20 is what they were trying to avoid communicating to the students and teachers. The instructions are so convoluted that it requires cryptography to glean that a student can pass with all * Tasks completed, and at least 5 Compulsory Tasks, which as a minimum was doubtless craved by Indonesian students of English, who perhaps weren’t in a position, language wise, to be able to comprehend it, despite iteration, which ought to have clarified, but merely added to the obfuscation:

• 10-12: PASS
• For a score of 10 and over, you must complete; all * Tasks, most Compulsory Tasks (5 tasks)
• 13-16: STRONG PASS
• For a score of 13 and over, you must complete all * Tasks, all Compulsory Tasks, some Additional Tasks (2 tasks)
• 17-20: EXCEPTIONAL
• For a score of 17 and over, you must complete all * Tasks, all Compulsory Tasks, most Additional Tasks (4 tasks), some Self-Study Tasks

 For pedophile slavers, working on the margins, calculating for syndicates, waging betting wars to show that they’ve backed winners, or whoever’ll be placed, after the placement tests are won, students and teachers are expected to display concern in personal interactions; just short of genuine affection: for the sake of the cosmetic appearance of Fagin’s pickpockets, ‘Please, sir, I want some more.’ (2) Despite the plaint of Oliver ‘Everyman’ Twist, as expressed in Charles Dickens’ novel of the 19^th century poor, Oliver Twist (1838), the socioeconomic views of learner and learned, with regard to the desirability of education to obviate the criminal boys and girls gangs, represented by elderly London fence, Fagin, depend on the discouraging of those offering Quality Street sweets (1), while gangsters satisfy their desire for suites at hotels, and slave traffic’s all one way.

 The establishment’s modern education system, obviously delaying punishment for Everyman Oliver, is the dark cages of 21^st century computerism, where work-at-home slavery in poorly lit cubicles, with flickering screens, are reminiscent of Fanny By Gaslight (1940), a novel by Michael Sadleir of the prostitutes of the Victorian age. (3) As an ultra-modern generation of poverty stricken work the screens beneath the batteries of the enemy lowering at their abused eyes, Sadleir’s understanding is salutary, ‘Why would I desire beautiful discourse when I perceive the soul of another within my own?’ (4) Being worked to death, as a slave, is rather demonic than inspired; demons, who without explaining that telecommunications aren’t for understanding their QR codes, would prefer that the teacher just chalk.

Notes

a) Their efforts adjudicated and marked, as best understood by the slave:

Students completing all mandatory * Tasks and at least 5 + Compulsory Tasks, but below 9, received 10.

Students completing all mandatory * Tasks and at least 9 + Compulsory Tasks, received 11.

Students completing all mandatory * Tasks and all Compulsory Tasks received 12.

Students completing all mandatory * Tasks, all Compulsory Tasks, and at least 2 Additional Tasks, qualified for a mark of 13 +, so received a mark from 13 to 16.

Students completing all mandatory * Tasks, all Compulsory Tasks, and up to 5 Additional Tasks, but not Week 12’s, qualified to received a mark of 13 +, but below 17.

Students completing all mandatory * Tasks, all Compulsory Tasks, and at least 4 Additional Tasks, including Week 12’s, qualified for a mark of 17 +, so received a mark between 17 and 20.

b) A Whatspp conversation between the ‘colleagues’; sampled to indicate that some black humor yet remained in their master and servant relationship:

Slave, September 24^th, ‘I have a Padlet account. Since 2014.’

Colleague, September 24^th, stardate 2022, ‘I don’t think you need a Padlet [pad to let] account do you in order to make comments on their work?’

Colleague, November 3^rd, ‘I’d like to retire early.’

Colleague, November 30^th, ‘Are you still in the land of the living?’

Slave, November 30^th, ‘I have an electric blanket.’

Colleague, November 30^th, ‘I suppose it’s better than an electric chair …’

Slave, November 30^th, [no comment]

Colleague, December 1^st, ‘Repent while there’s still time.’

Rev. Dr, Slave S. Slave, B.A. (Hons.), Ph.D., D.Div, December 1^st, [no comment]

Colleague, December 3^rd, ‘How much would a flat [pad + toalett/toilet] cost me in Budapest?’

Slave, December 3^rd, ‘I already have someone waiting for me to die so they can inherit.’

Colleague, December 4^th, ‘Terminal?’

Slave, December 4^th, [no comment]

Colleague, December 4^th, ‘How long do you think you’ve got left?’

Colleague, December 4^th, ‘I’ve had a few crematorium plans sent to me.’

Colleague, December 4^th, ‘I can send you the link if you’d like?’

Colleague, December 4^th, ‘I’m looking for a warm, cheap, and safe place to emigrate. Any suggestions let me know. Thanks.’

Colleague, December 4^th, ‘... I suppose a funeral is cheaper in Hungary [toalett = toilet in Hungarian]?’

Slave, December 4^th, [no comment]

Colleague, December 6^th, ‘I’m picking up a few tips from The Idler [1993-] magazine concerning how to live frugally.’

Colleague, December 6^th, ‘Go down fighting.’

Slave, December 6^th, [no comment]

Colleague, January 14^th, stardate 2023, ‘… leave instructions leaving me your studio it would be very much appreciated.’

Slave, January 14^th, [no comment]

Slave quoting remark made January 14^th by colleague, on January 28^th, ‘”… leave instructions leaving me your studio [flat] it would be very much appreciated.”’

Slave comment, January 28^th, ‘Killing observation.’

Colleague, January 30^th, ‘I’m still waiting for proof of earnings too.’

Slave, January 30^th, [no commen?]

Slave quoting colleague, January 30^th, ‘How much would a flat [film and movie production studio] cost me in Budapest?’

Slave comment, January 30^th, ‘Are you trying to kill me..?’

Slave quoting remark made December 4^th by colleague, on January 30^th, ‘”How long do you think you’ve got left?”’

Slave comment, January 30^th, ‘Forever [not a bad toilet].’

Bibliography

1 Quality Street, named for J. M. Barrie's comedy drama, premiering at Knickerbocker Theatre, New York city, 1396 Broadway, November 11^th, 1901, about a character, Valentine, the suitor of a woman not her sweet appearance, is manufactured by Swiss company, Nestlé (1988-), headquartered in Vevey, Vaud, Switzerland, as a line of tinned and boxed toffees, chocolates and sweets; first manufactured by Mackintosh's confectionery in Halifax, West Yorkshire, England, from 1936.

2 Dickens, Charles, Oliver Twist, or The Parish Boy’s Progress, Ch. 2, ‘Treats of Oliver Twist’s growth, education, and board’, Richard Bentley, 1838.

3 Empress of the British Empire, Victoria became England’s queen, aged 18, in 1837 until her demise in 1901, which 63 year span is known as the Victorian Age.

4 Sadleir, Michael Fanny By Gaslight, ‘Croyez-vous que j'ai soif d'une parole sublime lorsque je sens qu'une âme me regarde dans l'âme?’, Constable & Co., 1940, p. 341.

A Free Can

North Africa is mainly comprised of the sterility of the Sahara desert, 9, 200, 000 km² (3, 600, 000 m²), apart from the fertile coastal regions of Sudan, Egypt, Libya, Tunisia, Algeria, Morocco, and Mauritania (see fig. 1), which is where Libya’s cities, such as the capital Tripoli; Sirte, Tripolitania district, and the nearby town of Ar’s Anuf’s ARSCO gas generating power station, are. Often murderously hot, average 38-40° C, the cloudless Sahara, but with nighttime temperatures freezing, is 4, 800 km (3, 000 m) in length, and 1, 800 km (1, 100 m) deep into the heart of the African continent, encompassing large parts of Chad, Mali, and Niger, which incidentally, above it on the continental map, isn’t Nigeria. The view of the warm, deep, coastline of the blue sea is captivating, even in the winter months, and even warmer in the summer, although journeying on foot to the souk from the Excelsior motel (see fig. 2), chosen by the English language teaching purveyor, SQIRAL, for a 3 dinar self-paid box of staples (500 dinar = 100 euros), and a 30 dinar sheaf of A4 copy paper (500 sheets), as stapling together photocopied test papers was a large part of the daily routine, and sometimes stapes or sheaves weren’t brought in; or take his browned underwear there for washing, was a chore barely ameliorated by the local laundry’s amenability in agreeing to collect the soiled items on certain evenings, as they were invariably returned at midnight the following day, so the teacher, bedraggled by the day’s incitements, had to waddle in their thob, worn in lieu of righteously eschewed sensible pajamas, to recover everything. Including the apparently obligatory odd grey sock, which was never yorn, in the earliest hours of the morning, conveniently imaginable to the delivery van, so as not to arrive at the training center later (but not by over much) that morning in that old green T-shirt, with a collar that did with a tie; if all else failed.

Fig. 1 North Africa

 Criticized for wearing that same old black suit, after his other green suit was mislaid in January 2015 by Turkish Airlines, subsequent to their failing to put a ticket on the luggage, as it sailed off on the conveyor belt at check-in at the city of Dammam’s King Fahd International Airport, Saudi Arabia, before it’d finally arrived weeks later at Budapest’s Ferenc Liszt International Airport, Ferihegy, Hungary, only to be snaffled by local yokels (jó, kell), and having purchased a suit mail order from the US, which’d arrived much too large, it was up to the Hungarian tailors to periodically avow their inability, or capacity, to alter to fit; thereby maintaining their sartorial critique upon his elegance.

Eloquence unfuddled, however, with six weeks on, and four more weeks, but paid off, and six weeks on again, between February and June, 2023, and three square meals a day at the cafeteria, there was only the local bussing about to be negotiated, after the madness at Turkey’s Istanbul Airport, Amavutköy, with the stumbling about with the trousers foolishly around the ankles there, as the decision to be obliged to have you relinquish your belt, and your shoes, , had long since passed, before the plane to Libya. Following the back-breaking cross nation bus ride from Mitiga International Airport, Tripoli, 7 hours non-stop (a few hours more in a sandstorm, and if you want to eat at a diner and take a pee), and 653. 4 km there and back (x4 per contract), that is, 2, 613. 6 km (1, 624 m, or a quarter of the way to Jo’burg, S.A., there was only the daily regional bus rides, and the usual joys of training the trainees remaining to be diplomatically hurdled, which given the degree of politesse required by North Africans, whose belief it is that everyone else deems them cannibal slavers, or slaves, is well nigh impossible. Aside from looking at the menu and wondering who was on it, as it bubbled and squeaked inside the heavily lidded bacofoil lined urns at mealtimes; knifing it, forking it, and spooning it in, within the time limit set for eating the ample fare (5 min), was a significant task in itself, and worthy of some descriptive script from the scribbler. Breakfast was fairly simple, apart from the cornflakes, which required milk from a churn with a spigot situated alongside the tea and coffee churns, making it difficult to determine where the white stuff would be, although the bowled sugar was a no-brainer with plazzy spoons provided (see fig. 3), and what appeared to be lollipop sticks to remind us it was stir. Usually left to see whether there’d be time, before the tray was abandoned to the kitchen sink personnel, the bowled cornflakes remained provisionally edible, until either milk was obtained, or the chain gang, chin egged, though grateful it wasn’t yet porridge, were called to assembly by their co-ord.

Fig. 2 El Fadeel motel

 The plazzy pots of honey and jam could be pocketed, and used instead of scarce sugar, for the coffee and tea at the training center; along with the Neapolitan wafer biscuits, marketed as 'Vienna fingers' by the Manner confectionery company, which only left the triangular foil wrapped cheese slices, and/or the individually wrapped in see-thru plazzy processed cheese slices; eggs to peel to eat with bread rolls, and a plate of tuna and beans, for the gastronome to demolish, before each armed with a free bottle of water to deposit into the kettle, the gang embarked, on the bus that took them jouncing, and flouncing along, after a tanker shown by the sea to the horizon, danke schön, at break back velocity to their inland destination at the learning center for English language training.

 Although at end of each six week contract, it was almost impossible to walk, and during, experience had taught the English language purv to obtain the needed vitamins, herbs, fruits, vegetables, and unguents, to maintain the bod’, and ensure the delivery per paid hour of chat abating satisfaction. The task began with relative equanimity; Cambridge’s Preliminary English Test (PET), requiring the inculcation of the four skills; reading, writing, speaking, and listening. There’d be a mock examination at the end of each week; adjusted to the level of capability of the students, with the objective of achieving B1 level of competence, that is, Intermediate, presumably as opposed to ‘long range’, on the Common European Framework of Reference (CEFR), while the teaching staff entered the arena armed only with the textbook, English File, and the knowledge that there’d be one-to-one ‘Speaking’ tests for the students to negotiate, as well as audio sessions in the computer lab, with headsets for them to wear, while completing answer sheets, based on what they heard. For teachers, it’s useful, as students are convinced that the educator is there to correct what they write, and then they’re educated, because that’s how slavers think, so it comes as somewhat of a shock for many of them to discover that the teacher can’t speak and listen for them too, which is 50% of the students’ goal, whereas for the teacher the objective is to politely put the money earned into the bank, before perhaps reading Invitation To A Beheading (1935-6) by Russian-American emigré Vladimir Nabokov, in translation from the original Russian, as it appeared in the magazine, Sovremennye zapiski, Paris, France, leisurely.

Fig. 3 Well used plazzy spoon in Arabic

 Bussed back to the cafeteria for a very late lunch at around 2.00 pm, the meal was a free can; Pepsi, Shirley, or Mirinda, etc., rice, meat, beans, spaghetti, savory pastry, bowled soup, bread rolls, and some fruit; banana, orange, apple, etc., as well as a dessert of some shape or form. Then it’s back to the motel with the mandatory bottle of water to prepare for the next morning’s bus to breakfast at 7.00 am, with the option of taking the bus afforded outside the motel at 7.00 pm in the evening for a further meal at the cafeteria, much the same as lunch, and with hopefully an equal emphasis on antiseptic wet wipes sealed in foil, which the cognoscenti use to disinfect their ass, rather than use the water hose to perform their ablutions, as is de rigeur amongst the Moslem nations of Islam, but appears unhygienic to people from the Earth’s Western hemisphere, brought up to prevent AIDS, rather than shrug resignedly, as who wouldn’t with the recommended toilet facilities?

 Popular with the other members of the chain gang, because of a functioning stapler, bought in Syria’s city of Deir Ezzor, at or around Christmas, 2002, before the Civil war there (2012-19), with the Independent State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS), and its putative Caliph of the Islamic State of Islam in the Levant (ISIL), Iraq’s Abu Bakr Al Baghdadi, possessing the city from 2014, it was stolen on the last day of the four months, although the scissors bought at the local souk, since the airlines frown on such dangerous items in luggage, didn’t last so long in my possession. My other apparent usefulness consisted in relinquishing an 8GB Sandisk thumb drive for the co-ord to put the mock PET ‘Listening’ exam onto at the end of each week, as an MP3 file to play by remote control at the portable audio console in the fully equipped classroom, with smart board, and overhead projector (OHP), if they’d been on, which they weren’t.

Fig. 4 Who do you suppose these people are trying to annoy?

 Otherwise, it was the wipe board and elbow grease allied to a marker pen, and another bored rubber, as is normative in those countries, where access to the word processing facilities of PCs are denied, as if proximity to the internet were a threat to the hub of a national intelligence network’s preoccupations with maintaining its state’s secrecy. Libya, of course, had its own Civil war; Ar’s Anuf captured and recaptured by government and rebel forces throughout 2011, before the deposing of dictator, Col. Gadaffi (d. October 20^th, 2011), apparently bayoneted in the ass, as there wasn’t anyone to prolong his misery with AIDS. There in Tripoli, as a teacher with Bell, when the conflict began, the British were ordered to pull out. Upon my return, after the war, a brief spell at Globals, Tripoli, culminated in my being held up at gunpoint, waved away impatiently, after pulling pockets inside out to indicate nothing was wanted between the buttocks.

Fig. 5 Tram stop

 Nothing in comparison to Budapest, Hungary, where a knife wielding maniac stabbed through the top of my head, while girlfriend giggled, as the blood fountained up at Csóka utca to splash the painted metal roof of the # 49 yellow and white tram (see fig. 5) on its way from Deák Ferenc tér, where the hub of underground Metros 1, 2, and 3 is located, to a buffered terminus at Kelenföld, Újbuda kerület, that is, New Buda district (Bp. XII), as Buda is at the other side of the Danube river to Pest, where’s located underground, Metro 4, close by the northern railway station, with its regular train to the city of Zagreb, capital of Croatia, itself torn by Civil war (1991-2) with Serbs, subsequent to its declaration of independence from the artificially constructed communist ‘superstate’, Yugoslavia, after World War Two’s (1939-45) defeat of German ambitions of slavery, along with those of the other ‘Axis powers’; Italy, Japan, and Iraq, and its concomitant, Eastern Europe’s occupation by communism, as Russia’s ‘Red Army’ refused to relinquish its hold, after ‘liberating’ German occupied Eastern Europe’s nations en route to capturing Germany’s capital city, Berlin.

 Assisting Bosnia against its Serbs in the Bosnian war (1992-5), Croatia facilitated the independence of Bosnia and Herzegovina, where 70, 000 Moslem women, incarcerated in ‘rape camps’, built for that purpose, were raped by Serb Christian militia, at Vilina Vlas, for example, 4 km north-east of the town and municipality of Viŝegrad, e.g., in the village of Viŝegradska Banja, resting at the confluence of the Drina and Rzav rivers, and elsewhere, as a part of the anathema known as ‘ethnic cleansing’, before the Republika Sprska, the region where Vilina Vlas was, became an entity of an independent Bosnia and Herzegovina.

Photographs, available through the internet, showing the damage shellfire did to the Excelsior motel, before rebel forces finally captured Ar’s Anuf in September 2011, were a further salutary reminder to the teacher, made complacent by only apparently tight security measures, of safety’s precariousness. Terrorism comes in many guises, and the students used each week’s Speaking test to accuse the teacher of peeking at their penis, which it’s useful for naïve young EFL teachers to know, as it’s a practice widespread amongst slavers, who’re taught castration through vilification, as a matter of course, in the process of ensuring compliance and obedience, especially amongst the Moslems of the nations of Islam, where the teachers are expected to be eunuchs, as they aren’t permitted any active sexual activity, which helps the community to have them serve it.

Fig. 6 Together's discus

 Jesus, the founder of Christianity, to take but one example, was killed by the apparent homosexual, Judas, for being with a woman, despite his pleading, ‘Leave her alone.’ (Mk: 14. 6) That Judas’ appeal to the Jewish religious police, the Pharisees, and the Empire of Rome, then occupying Palestine, in the name of their Emperor, Tiberius Caesar Augustus (14-37 C.E.), succeeded in having the teacher executed, should be sufficient to persuade any Christian not to undertake a speaking test in the naïve understanding that you’re at liberty to feel anything at all: ever.

 With some variations, Part One of the Speaking test consists of a two minute introductory assessment of the student’s basic identity, for example, ‘What is your name?’ And, ‘Where do you live?’ Obviously the response can be longer, or shorter, depending on the student’s command of English language, but the actual information elicited is rather meager. However, when asked, ‘Are you a student, or do you work?’ the respondent is likely to appear nonplussed and offended at the very idea of being asked to give away state or military secrets likely to threaten the internal security of their nation, which is useful for new teachers to recognize that they’re dealing with psychopathic values inculcated at the level of the local mosque.

 When a student invites you for coffee, and you find yourself drinking it from a tray in a corridor outside his apartment, as he doesn’t want you to see his wife, you’ve been wallied in Islam. Take a deep breath, and back away; if you insist on meeting the family of Walid, you’ll find yourself back on the doorstep at some distant point in the future, because the family didn’t want to see you, Wally, the first time they were made to - and you weren’t permitted sex either.

Fig. 7 B1 descriptors

 Although the format of the formal Cambridge Speaking examination is to have an interlocutor, and an assessor, who only assesses the paired students being examined, without peeking, it’s common in short-staffed training centers for a teacher to perform both roles, as a forced necessity. Part Two of the peeking test consists of a few themed questions about media, travel, environmental ecology, etc., before Part Three’s comparison of pictures and some questions about them (see fig. 4), which are supplemented by the student’s paired partner asking a question; for example, when the pictures are about entertainment, ‘Do you like concerts?’ Parts Two, Three, and Four, last approximately four minutes each, with Part Four mainly consisting of a topic at the center of a diagram (see fig. 6); for example, learning English language, and the paired students discuss the topic, based on suggestions for the discussion arrayed balloon-like around the central subject inside its own balloon. The test ends with the examiner asking questions related to the theme; other than the rather transparent issue of the penis’ desired functionality.

 That’s it for the students, of course, who naturally believe that’s it for the teacher too, who probably has to test 3 classes at 16 pairs of students per class at 14 minutes each each week (4 hours x3, without accounting for time traveling, absences, and unforeseeable delays), and invariably with an odd one out for each group, who has to go it alone, but with help perforce from a volunteer amongst his peers, sitting in as a makeweight, while they each consider themselves the focus of ‘the eyes of Allah’, whereas the Cambridge descriptors then have to be applied by the examiner.

 To assess proficiency at A2 level, it’s to be borne in air that, for the military A2s are leather flight jackets, which mnemonic is used as a designator by air force HQ intelligence; for itself and its security staff, whereas US’ A10 ‘pigs’, so-called because of the sharp snorting sound made by their 30 x 173 mm GAU-8/A Avenger autocannon, located at the snout of the aircraft’s fuselage, and deployed most noticeably in the Gulf war (1990-1) to remove from Kuwait WWII Axis power, Iraq, its invasion force dictated by President Saddam Hussein, with slightly different criteria.

 While at Cambridge A2 level, Vocabulary and Grammar aren’t conflated, but separate, Discourse Management descriptors are reserved for B2 level (see fig. 7), as Key English Test (KET), is the novice level prior to PET’s B1, ‘BOne’, level competence assessment for those who want to live and work in an English speaking country, or FCE (First Certificate in English) at B2 level, which as it’s also the name of the US’ stealth ‘Spirit’ bomber, and above, seems a lot to struggle with, even without considering ‘Beef if dey does,’ that is The B-52’s, and their contribution to the listening test theme of environmental protection, ‘Love Shack’ (1979), which of course is where it shat:

‘Bang, bang, bang, on the door, baby

I can’t hear you.’1

 Awarding 5 marks, or below, for Vocabulary and Grammar (speak slowly and selectively, and use only the words you’re able to), Discourse Management (don’t hog), Pronunciation (articulate like a steel trap), and Interactive Communication (know when to shut it), with an overall application of Global descriptors, amounts to x5 from whatever score the student has amassed out of 20. If the assessor determines the student has 17 marks, for example, the average is 4. 25, which is routinely added (21. 25) to arrive at 25% of the exam total. Although the rubric can be applied more strictly, and training centers do vary in their rigorousness in terms of descriptor application, it’s recommended that teacher and students, when preparing for the KET, PET, or FCE, refer to examples of the Cambridge exam proper, as the relatively unchanging format is an industry standard.

 Similarly, as the lyric to heavy rock group Led Zeppelin’s track, ‘In The Evening’, from the album In Through The Out Door (1979), goes, as an’ I grant you, at first seeming non sequitur here, ‘when the day is done’2 the educator ensconced themselves in a comfortably pillowed position at the motel to correct, and/or grade, until 2.00-3.00 am, whatever largely meaningless drivel the students were able to compose on paper for the mock ‘Reading and Writing’ and ‘Listening’ examinations, in the course of their pursuit of adequacy, which required rubrics, a red pen, utilized with swift, implacable, unerring determination and ruthlessness; determining scores, percentages, compiling the statistics, and awarding the laurels to the champions, or belaboring the duffers with the inflated pig’s bladder on a stick; metaphorically, or physically, as the teacher deemed themselves safe enough to think about their own penis, which of course is what the mock combat exercises are designed to prevent, as solid yeah’s: saving each other’s holiness.

 Collapsing inexplicably prone onto the floor during an audio practice session, while the students were going through the pockets of an ostensibly dead teacher, perhaps for signs of a medical insurance policy, I awoke, to be informed by the nearest that I’d been shot by another close to him; an idea I belayed by careful examination of the supposed corpse for evident injury, although it’s useful for those new to the profession to be aware that collapsed teachers are more likely to attract pickpockets than First Aid proponents, which incidentally, b’Jove, this teacher felt important enough to add to his CV.

 Generally speaking, working at high security installations requires a degree of tolerance not ordinarily available to younger professionals, where workers are expected to at least look and behave as if they’re unfeeling automata to fit in with the requirements of a regimented system; for example if the laundry is taken from the motel, as the facilities are perhaps still kaput from grenade rocketry, before being returned there, after being laundered, walking to the souk to take your clothes to the laundry yourself is probably either a security issue, or a gangster issue, that is, it isn’t advisable. That the room has a view of the sea at the back of the motel, but the lock of the outer door to the veranda is broken, while the inner door can be jury rigged to lock sufficiently to deter the casual browser, has a similar meaning. Cheery bus drivers are ten-a-penny, but not as cheap as a corpse for a pickpocket. That you don’t speak Arabic is no protection against aspersion. Looks, glances, suggestive behavior, things being implied, are lethal weapons used with perfunctory disdain by professional killers, who want the ‘phone in your room, or as little even as the 5GB Libyana ‘phone top up voucher code on your dressing table, which hasn’t yet had the strip scratched off with a pencil to reveal the magic number giving access to the internet, Whatsapp, and email, which are necessary for the uploading, and downloading, of supplementary teaching materials to print at the pig (P@tP) from the stroll in bones’ ‘jumpin’ Jack’ USB flash drives, that is, by means of the bus to the office photocopier; in order properly to complete the tasks of a contractually obligated employee.

1 Pierson, Kate, Fred Schneider, Keith Strickland, and Cindy Wilson, ‘Love Shack’, The B-52’s, Cosmic Thing, Reprise, 1979.

2 Jones, John Paul, Jimmy Page, and Robert Plant, ‘In The Evening’, Led Zeppelin, In Through The Out Door, Swan Song, 1979.

Portrait of the English Language Torture as a Smelly Alcoholic Beggar Like Jesus

Many English language teaching professionals are used to signing contracts to work amongst the Moslems of the nations of Islam, where alcohol isn’t permitted,  which appears in the contract, alongside a dress code, and noises about appropriate deportment while working. Nothing objectionable there; however, when it’s a mixed culture, with multi-ethnic features, certain peculiarities begin to arise; contractually, for example: the ELT pros find themselves being inveigled into accepting that they’re smelly alcoholics to start with. Leaving aside the English pogrom, which is to assert categorically that there’s a possibility that you’ve been having sex with kindergartners, which you have to refute and prove false as allegations only, implying that the teacher is a beggarly drunk, with bad body odor (BBO), is but a drop in the ocean of insult, when it comes to negotiating contracts with the death camp orderlies, purporting to be providing English language trainers as a business opportunity.

 The concept of training is interesting; if the term business is dropped in favor of vampirism. It then becomes illuminating, as teachers are drained by the vampire, rather than trained, which allows the employee to gain insight into the nature of the activity, that is, death camp slavery. It won’t have escaped the notice of the profession that chalk and cheese is what schools are about, for example, the IT engineer that helpfully shows the educator how to connect their smart ‘phone to the overhead projector (OHP) in the classroom, using Bluetooth, is cheese to the colleague who politely explains that there aren’t any modern conveniences, and shows the new teachers from the Philippines and Sidcup the tin with the bits of chalk inside beside a blackboard. The doyen of IT will live and thrive, while the beggars with the tin will plod on until they dodder off the scaffolding and plummet to extinction.

 Cheese is the issue of course. Saying cheese with style in front of the camera, so that the employer can see the effect that the teacher will have on the boys and girls that come into the classroom environment, is the basic principle attending the selection process, as the end of the first quarter of the 21^st century is approaching. Already the has beens, with their thinning hair, and knowledgeable air, are being targeted by Skype artists - and Zoom off somewhere - with the explanation that, although the plethora of tasks for the job applicant to complete would require a PhD in computer science and linguistics, ‘no experience is necessary’, because ideally teenage high school students is what the We Chat, Twitter, and tweet pedophiles want to use, as attractive bait to predatorily practice devouring the potential of kids with ‘big heads’, like cartoon Tweety’s in the Merrie Melodies Warner Bros. cartoons, and truncate the life possibilities of those with already fully developed intellects:

‘I am a little, tiny, bird. My name is Tweety Pie

I live inside my bird cage, a-hanging way up high

I like to swing upon my perch and sing my little song

But there's a tat that's after me and won't let me alone

I taut I taw a puddy tat a creepin' up on me

I did! I taw a puddy tat as plain as he could be!

I am that great big bad old cat, Sylvester is my name

I only have one aim in life and that is very plain

I want to catch that little bird and eat him right away

But just as I get close to him, this is what he'll say

I taut I taw a puddy tat a creepin' up on me

You bet he taw a puddy tat, that puddy tat is me!’1

 Although teachers are paid to speak with the students, they’re expected to stop speaking with them, as a matter legally enforceable; for example, this injunction from a contract’s ‘Code of Contact’, put together by a school in Wazakhstan, South East Asia, Escola Internazionale Enterprise, ‘Teachers must not fraternize with the students outside of school.’2 Filthy animals stick to the rubric, and don’t let us catch you out, or it’s the Wazakh (Polish, Slovak, Saudi, Sudanese, Japanese, etc.) policemen. Directed at supposedly trusted, well-qualified, experienced members of society, who, already regularly subjected to police checks, live as hunted prey in an undeclared persecution of those who’re close enough to the still impressible to speak about how concentrated juice live without having to be raped and diluted.

 Demonstrating too much savvy towards employers, who want the slave-like obedience of automata, isn’t going to assuage the ego of the adversary, who doesn’t want to be told that an HDMI feminine adapter for the VGA will connect the teacher’s laptop to the OHP, so that Junior Big Head Extra Special Unique Edition (the 3^rd) student’s course book can be screened, but wants to point to the chalk tin and the blackboard, which is an approach reserved for thin aired gloops who have a knowledgeable hair, while the high school drop outs that bluffed a TEFL certificate in a two day haze of alcohol at a local hotel in Bromwich smoke something in shisha pipes while they’re waiting for whatever’s their bag with perhaps abiyah to pay too.

 Far be it for the ELT eggspurt to suggest that the active agent in the film is the equivalent of the protagonist in French-American woman novelist Anaïs Nin’s A Spy In The House Of Love (1954), but it’s a ‘knocking shop‘, where the purportedly unwashed, beggarly ‘alkies’, are jeered off the premises, as bollockless brownies without any points. Moreover, it’s in the interests of the proprietors to be the ‘studs’ on the farm, or to put in the boot with the studs if the air looks like it’s getting a bit thicker around the oldest stuffer. Arriving in Budapest, Hungary, aged 35 or so, for years before Putin ‘the boot’ was elected as President of the Russian Federation, and being in the fortuitous position of being able to purchase a betéti társaság, that is, a private Ltd. Co., post-Soviet Union and pre-Ukraine invasion, one’s bollocks were shot off on a tram near Kelenföld northern railway station; emphasized with the imprecation, ‘Sign here!’ A quarter of a century or so later, the ethnically unclean beggarly alcoholic impotent English language teacher is being jeered for being disabled, even if even if someone else pays, which they might, and it’s jabbed under his nose constantly: like coke.

 Post-Covid the old lag was inveigled into going to Tashkent, Uzbekistan, neighbor to Kyrgyzstan, where the rebellious sexygenarian was already a has been, for 300 US$ a month, and an apartment. When the electricity and water supply began to fluctuate to the extent that two weeks had passed without light, or clean clothes, it was evident that Prod Conch English Draining Centre, 14 Kakinokus street, Mirrorbad district, was implying that the International English Language Testing System (IELTS) specialist teacher they’d hired should be higher up on the gallows, as the hung amongst the locals were worried about the effect that the pleasant smell had been pennilessly having on the unshaven.

 According to Prod Conch English Draining Centre, local authority regulations demanded that the IMEI code of the sim card, provided by Brahma Couch for the teacher’s use in their work and life in Tashkent, be registered with the security agencies to ensure the safety of the invited guest, which meant that the laptop that the draining centre had insisted be brought by the torture became functionally useless within a few days of commencing employment, as the IMEI sim notified internet providers Ucell (us all your gear when we’ve made you destitute, so that u all c’n leave honey) of the existence of an unregistered IMEI code belonging to a functional Compaq CQ58 device. Despite assertions to the contrary, on the part of Climb Budge, all technical apparatus, connected with the sim card in use, had apparently to be registered with the surveillance apparatus of the responsive ministerium. The resourcefulness of the alkie beggar without any bollocks, but a deal of reputed pungency, resulted in the deployment of a Lenovo 3. 8 Yoga tablet, Marshmallow Lollipop, which thence linking the sim to the Compaq CQ58 afforded internet usage once again. However, demands from the extremist Ucell terrophone organization, that the IMEI code for the tablet be registered, led to the phone becoming remotely dysfunctionated. Dauntless, the indomitable ELT don put the Ucell sim into a Lenovo K5 smart ‘phone and, linking that with the Compaq CQ58, went on with the usage of the internet, before the K5 was rendered remotely useless (and still is) following upon the usual  IMEI code demands from Ucell.

 Unperturbed, although being denied access to his Tardis, ‘the Doctor’ sprang the sim with his ‘sonic screwdriver’ and, inserting it into an Alcatel modem, which was then USB portaled with the Compaq CQ58, internet usage went on apace; until the IMEI code for the modem’s absence was registered by the Ucell remote controller, and the lights went out, and the flat went, ‘Batteries!’ Protestations unavailing, after endeavoring to use the disabled sim in a UNIT (United Nations Intelligence Taskforce) ‘phone brought from Budapest, Hungary, with a Vodafone sim, only for the purpose of receiving the Austrian-based ERSTE bank verification codes, the remoter again disabled the ‘phone for failing to register its IMEI code. Found guilty of working without permission, the decrepit pensionable was hurled onto the street, without payment, for the final July month of his sojourning in the warmth of welcome.

 Destitute,  without functioning equipment registered with IMEI coding, home bank rejected payment for a flight ticket, based on the ‘phone sim’s seeming inability to receive the code verifying the bank’s acceptance of the necessity of the transference of the monies to the airline company in order for the teacher to escape his Pilate. The ERSTE Visa debit card with its 16 numeric digit identification code was functioning, and the expiry date hadn’t been arrived at (**/**), while the requirement of the inputting of the three digit CVV code (***) had been met without obstacle. However, the six digit (******) M-pin code demanded by the George (Putin?) software, after the seven digit telebank azonosító (*******) had been entered, which the torture had had since 1997, before George was sent to plague us, and the more recent eleven digit (***********) ‘e-channel’ safety pin for the diaper, on the Lenovo tablet 3. 8 Yoga, Marshmallow Lollipop, and that led an existence independent of the laptop, where the transaction was transpiring, was being rejected. Despite the would-be flight ticket purchaser’s knowing the code off by heart, as it was the IMEI code for his electronic toothbrush, and that was subsequently proven upon his return, when the MVM electricity bill was paid by using the M-pin code with the same George app in the same way as had been attempted to pay for the airline ticket online.

 Nevertheless, the ERSTE bank ‘phone representative was adamant that a new four digit (****), safe T-pin code, which could correspond exactly to the debit card pin code, and might have too, if the torture hadn’t been too brain damaged, with resisting the virus of hell from Satan’s SARS’ flammable flatulence, to remember it, was required, and that would have been sent, if the communication’s device hadn’t been disabled by the Uzbek IMEI elite disablement SWAT team(s), detailed to monitor the Cambridge assistant examiner’s online marking. The torture, having stored the T-pin code on an MS Word.doc on his laptop desktop, the remote Ucell conscientious objector disabled MS Windows and called ‘Shutdown - r!’ Undeterred, the torture booted up an emergency Ubuntu installation, little knowing that the T-pin code on the MS Windows desktop would prove indispensable, and for a week or so Ubuntu facilitated the continuation of the IELTS program at Crime Gorge’s premises at 14 Kokinakus street, before IMEI considerations forced the Ucell comptrollers to shutdown Ubuntu activity also.

 Once the T-pin code was given over the ‘phone to the ERSTE bank rep it would have been, like with the Tracy islanders of International Rescue (IR) on TV 21’s Thunderbirds Supermarionation puppet theatre show, without any controlling strings attached, as with the wooden cross of the resurrected teacher’s icon, Jesus, according to Christian thinking, ‘All systems are GO!’3 However, despite the M-pin code being accurately input, the George app wouldn’t accept it; the T-pin code would’ve been acceptable, but was unavailable, and the flight ticket was unsold at 497 US$. Perturbable, after almost two weeks oscillating, between sitting in a bus shelter along the main road route to the airport, Islam Karimov Tashkent International, and Jum café, bar, and restaurant  there, unaware that ERSTE would continue their joint pogrom of ‘ethnic cleansing’ of the teacher, with the Uzbeks, back in Budapest, Hungary, by making their response to his complaint unreadable, by virtue of withholding the code to open the bank’s letter of reply, which ought to have been K****** (K-for- külföld, that is, ‘foreigner’, + D.O.B, but wasn’t), the adventurer upped sticks and wombled over to the British Embassy to see the Consul, Noddy, who unable to persuade Pig Ears, the banking aficionado, to release monies to purchase a flight ticket, practically suggested emptying all of the money in my account at an ATM machine to buy a ticket and get the hell out of Tashkent. Previously unaware that the hell was in Tashkent and it was me, 10, 000, 000 som were squandered where 5, 000, 000 would have been sufficient, and the alkie pastored swung out of Islam Karim with his kit bag on his spine.

 I’d understood the banking system. It was PIN the tale on the donkey. They were in with the retailers. If the customer could be made to withdraw money from an ATM machine, there’d be a fee, and the airlines, for example, where a cheap ticket could be had online at a discount paid for by an instantaneous debit card transaction, would help the travel agent, as a retailer, if the donkey had to withdraw money, whilst abroad, to pay for their ticket at the counter in cash, as the ticket could be hugely in excess of the discounted price obtainable from the companies competing in a free online market. If this customer hadn’t been animal when he got off the plane, he’d been reduced to the animal level when he boarded again, with tickets of £3,000 for a flight out of Tashkent to Budapest being nothing to raise an eyebrow over quizzically, so far as bank and retailer are concerned, as long as it looks as if the donkey couldn’t pin the tail on itself, because the bank wouldn’t let go of its ‘Monkey’,4 or at least not before the representative of the alien traffic controllers had given themselves a chance at transmitting their mutated simian immune deficiency, SIV-related flying SARS UZ virus,5 to a person they’d made homeless in the middle of a global pandemic and left on the streets of Tashkent, UZ, to be homosexually raped, and die looted from AIDS, as some foreign Jews’ related ethnicity the ‘Zbekis had myopically cleansed themselves of; with a brusque efficiency not unlike that of a soccer manager, during a staff clear out, telling a player he won’t be returning after he’s ‘a loan’.

 As a privately contracted individual isn’t a loan, but alone, the sanctity of the teacher’s independent decision-making, with regard to his/her contracting of their own expertise, is what the law should be designed to uphold. As for the slave trafficker, to teach the undeclared slave that the slaver isn’t reneging on paying, when the loan period is up, is the entirety of the enslaver’s educational intent, with regard to the torture’s rights, whereas the expert in Business English has the teaching to think about; as well as the draining center’s apparently proposed need for a post-graduate PhD degree in Business Administration to assist the torture’s understanding of the contract.

 The English language teacher as Jesus was what had been discovered in Tashkent, Uzbekistan, where the archetype of the teacher was revealed to be that of the community scapegoat. While Jesus ‘Christ’, ‘the chosen’, was the teacher that the Jewish religious police, the Pharisees, wanted to torture, because of his teaching, ELT pros were simply teachers that the students and administration, and whoever else wanted to torture, for actively promulgating Jesus’ teaching,  ‘Love your neighbor as you love yourself.’ (Mk: 12.31) Given that, it’s important to understand that Jesus was executed by the Romans, then occupying Jewish Palestine, during the reign of the Emperor Tiberius Caesar Augustus (14-37 C.E.), because the founder of Christianity, which Christians believe supersedes the Jews’ Old Testament of the Bible, that is, their Torah and Talmud (history and law), was born from his mother, the Virgin Mary, uncontaminated by male semen.

 It’s evident from Jesus’ betrayal by his disciple, Judas, who finding the Messiah with a woman putting the perfume spikenard on him, introduced the spy canard that the ‘perfume’ should be sold to raise money for the disciples, who in the modern era correspond to badly smelling beggarly alkies, despite Jesus’ protestations, ‘Leave her alone.’ (Mk: 14. 6) As Judas’ philosophy correlates with host womb slavery for women, it’s hardly surprising that Jesus was taken to the hill of Calvary outside the city of Jerusalem, where he was nailed to a cross of wood, and died there. However, Jesus’ experiencing Resurrection and Ascension to heaven prefigures that of women’s seed. Born of his mother, the Virgin Mary, she’s depicted crushing the head of the serpent with her foot, because of a promise the creator, God, made to the woman, Eve, in the paradise of Eden, that her ‘seed’ would prevail, ‘You shall crush the head of the serpent with your foot, but he will bruise your heel.’(Gen: 3. 15) It was the angel, Satan, that was turned into a serpent by God for rejecting God’s plan that the human host be greater than the angelic. As women are a race physically independent in potentiam of men, symbolized by Jesus’ birth, born uncontaminated by male semen, called futanarian, and capable of self-fertilization, their brainpower is more human than that of the serpent’s seed, that is, male semen, which affords the possibility of escape from death through medical science; as well as colonization of the planets amongst the stars as women’s seed.

 When a woman was brought to him allegedly caught in adultery, Jesus said, ‘Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.’ (John: 8. 7) As women are a separate species, they’re adulterated by men, rather than adulterous, which is why the taking of Jesus’ mother, the Virgin Mary, bodily to heaven, is called the Assumption, and was made Christian dogma by the Roman church’s Pope Pius XI in 1950. Moreover, Jesus’ giving of bread and wine to the disciples, at what came to be known as ‘the Last Supper’, before his crucifixion, as symbols of his body and blood after his death, Resurrection and Ascension, became tokens in the Communion of the church, by which the petitioners received, from the officiate, Jesus’ promise of heaven, after death. However, Jesus’ officiate role at a Cana wedding, where the name of the town serves for the name of Palestine, before the Jews’ arrival, from their period of slavery to the Egyptian Pharaoh, Thutmose III (1485-1431 B.C.), where Jesus turned water into wine, is reminiscent of another episode from the narrative of his life, the New Testament of the Christian Bible, in which he met a man on the road near the town of Gadarene, ‘My name is Legion.’ (Mk: 5. 9) Jesus, perceiving that the Roman legion of demons had possessed the man, cast them out into a herd of pigs, that is, swine, that promptly ran off a cliff and drowned, and so were swine into water, symbolic of what the Roman legions represented for the Jews in Palestine; pig slavery.

 In Christianity, churches are where the people are collected as congregations, that call themselves flocks, with shepherd dogs, that is, their pastors wear ‘dog collars’, as the shepherds which guide, as sheep, their believers, who’re assured, by their participation in the receiving of the bread and wine of Communion, that they won’t be preyed on, that is, the Roman wolves won’t host womb slave and butcher them for meat, which is the danger the founders of Rome, raised by wolves, Romulus and Remus, according to tradition, represent. That the human sacrifice, Jesus, is called ‘the lamb of God’, supports the English language teaching professional as butcher’s meat hypothesis.

 The religious angle is that of blood sacrifice; perhaps a sublimation of the vampire’s draining of blood to assuage its thirst for the life force of the victim. Manifested amongst the Moslems of the nations of Islam as halal meat preparation, blood is drained from the slaughtered carcass of the animal to make it fit for ‘human’ consumption. Not according to Jewish religious experts, however; such as Dror Ben Ami, whose 2015 observation in the Jerusalem Post on Jesus’ sacrifice was, ‘Paul of Tarsus never said that the animal sacrifices of the Jews didn’t remove sins. To the contrary: he agreed they removed sins. The point Paul of Tarsus was trying to make was that the blood sacrifice of Jesus was a more effective way to remove sins, because it was only needed once, whereas Jewish blood sacrifices needed to be repeated year after year.’6  As English language tortures are a rare breed, prepared to go to communities across the world for experience and environmental variety, they’re ideal blood sacrifice animals; if that’s how Christians are defined by Roman Catholicism.

 The Moslems of the nations of the Middle East and elsewhere came in the 7^th century after Jesus’ teaching, when the angels of God, according to Islamic tradition, dictated the Koran (610-30 C.E.) to the Prophet Mohamed, which permitting four wives to the Moslem marriage, afforded the possibility for women’s seed to reproduce within the Islamic family. Prior to Islam, the worship of Baal, a bull god, was predominant in the region, and the shrine of Abraham, the Ka’ Ba, in the city of Mecca, Saudi Arabia, where the Haj pilgrims go, dedicated by Abraham’s concubine, Hajer, and her son, Ishmael, forebear of Mohamed, whose brother, Isaac, by Abraham’s wife, Sara, founded Judaism, has the stock footage shoe of a bull at the entrance to the stock cube, where they’d meat,  and the super beef would have bred.

 Hajer was ‘the Egyptian woman’ of the Bible, whose role as Abraham’s concubine is used by Judeo-Christianity label Islam illegitimate, as Mohamed is a descendant of Ishmael. However, as ‘Ka’ is spirit in the ancient religion of Egypt, and ‘Ba’ is soul, the Ka’ Ba represents women’s seed, as Ka plural is Kau, while Ba is Baal, that is, a bull has many cows. In Canaan, before a part of it became Jewish Palestine, after the Jews arrived from their slavery in Egypt, worshiped alongside Baal was Baalat, whose city, in what was also known as Phoenicia, was Byblos (now on modern Lebanon’s coast). She was the female bull, that is, the futa, so had the Bau of her ships. In the English nursery rhyme, the cow (Kau) ‘jumped over the moon’,3 while the ‘dog laughed’, Bau, because it’s the shepherd dog of Christianity, that is, the pastor with his dog collar, who thinks he’s the souper (food supervisor), although the dish, who are the futanarian women as the cow (Kau), have run ‘away with the spoon’, as the planets are colonized by the food; an Aryan (Indo-Iranian) race. For the cow is sacred to the Hindu religion of India, whose Vedas (c. 1500-900 B.C.), the beliefs of Hinduism, according to tradition, were written by super beings, apauruṣeya, who weren’t necessarily human either, as  their many armed gods, goddesses, and demons, resemble spiders, that is, they too were bred and wine to the breeders, who’re animals that eat humans; so that they can be ‘super’:

‘Hey diddle, diddle!

The cat and the fiddle,

The cow jumped over the moon;

The little dog laughed

To see such sport,

And the dish ran away with the spoon.’7

 In chapter 53 of the Koran, that is ‘The Star’ sura, an-Najm, النجم‎, there’s a reference to al-Lat, a member of a trinity of three goddesses, for whom Indian novelist, Salman Rushdie, had a fatwa declared upon him, that is, Moslem religious extremists demanded his execution, for drawing attention to them in his The Satanic Verses (1988), as evidence for women’s seed. The sura describes the notion that women are for men only as ‘bizarre’. References to the three goddesses, who were probably futanarian women who bred, were suppressed, although the name of Al-Lat is preserved in the association of Baalat with the Ka’ Ba, that is, Ka’ Ba Al-Lat, as for the cognoscenti Islam is a breeding program only for them:

‘Have you considered al-Lat and al-Uzza?

And Manat, the third one, the other?

Are you to have the males, and he the females?

What a bizarre distribution.’ (19-22)

 The concept of the elect would, then, refer to those of the slaughtered sheep who are supermen, in the sense of being superior to the food, which elitism figures largely in the memories of First World War (1914-18) soldiers, being ordered by their officiates to walk at a slow pedestrian pace towards the German machine guns, so that they could be massacred in an orderly manner. Of course, no one would suggest that leaving a teacher without water, or electricity, for two weeks, and refusing to pay 300 US$ salary owing, so the teacher would have to pay out everything from his savings in his bank account to leave Prod Conch English Draining Centre, Tashkent, Uzbekistan, was butchering an animal as a blood sacrifice by an elitist human officiate, but it smells of alkies, beggary, and torture. Moreover, with a gas oven still functioning, the torture had still been able to cook food in Asia, where the supposedly unbeatable United States’ army had been defeated in the Vietnam war (1955-75), against those they called ‘gooks’, by the Chinese, who’d halted the Americans’ military campaign against Indo-China, as the Vietnamese were in their ‘back yard’, and the US was interfering with the shoots of a new growth. In Cambodia, before it was invaded by the Vietnamese in 1979, Pol Pot was the leader of the Khmer, who were notorious for the ‘killing fields’,8 as photo journalist, Dith Pran, called Pot’s ‘food fight’, depopulating a third of the country to establish an agrarian economy, without intellectualism, so that the food could grow more peacefully before the next harvest.

 Although the German Nazis of WWII (1939-45) thought of themselves as Aryan ‘supermen’, that is, übermenschen, building ‘ovens’ at Belsen concentration camp in Lower Saxony, near the town of Bergen, Northern Germany, and elsewhere, to incinerate the bodies of the dead Jews they’d worked to death as ‘aliens’, the story was similar to that of Cain and Abel, the able brother of the Bible, who made an offering of an animal on a flaming altar to God, who was pleased, because cooking was an improvement on the fruit offered by Cain, who promptly killed his brother, but didn’t cook and eat him, because he wasn’t apauruṣeya, as the Hindus called breeders, that is, like the futanarian race of women’s seed, able Jews aren’t food: an Aryan race, and its leader Adolf Hitler’s National Socialist (Nazi) Party’s ethnic cleansers, after being democratically elected in 1933, weren’t Godly either, that is, Aryan soupers, because they were only cooks. God is pleased with food that cooks well, but doesn’t want the food to eat. Although at least His ape’ll continue to show a neck that’s clean to the skull nose; so as upset avoid. Cannibals don’t like inflammatory noises coming from the foot chained, so the food is taught that it isn’t.

1 Foster, Warren, Alan Livingston, and Billy May, ‘I Tawt I Taw A Puddy Tat’, Tweety Pie (1947), Mel Blanc, Warner Bros., Merrie Melodies, 1951.

2 Escola Internazionale Enterprise Foreign Teachers Contract, ‘Code of Contact’ Ѽ, p. 6.

3 Barrett, Ray as the voice of Commander Casey in Thunderbirds Are Go, Century 21 Cinema Productions, Associated Television, 1966.

4 My pivots, ’In finance, a Monkey is British slang for 500 pounds sterling. The term monkey came from soldiers returning from India, where the 500 rupee note had a picture of a monkey on it. They used the term monkey for 500 rupees and on returning to England the saying was converted for sterling to mean £500’, https://www.mypivots.com/dictionary/definition/492/monkey-500-pounds .

5 Wessner, Dave ‘This HIV/AIDS Specialist Explains Its Similarities - And Differences - To COVID-19’, Forbes, April 22^nd, 2020, 10: 00 am EDT, https://www.forbes.com/sites/coronavirusfrontlines/2020/04/22/this-hivaids-specialist-explains-its-similarities---and-differences---to-covid-19/ .

6 Ami, Dror Ben ‘Metaphors in the Torah: The Roles of Blood and the Liver in Removing Sin’, The Jerusalem Post, February 10th, 2015, 18:57 pm, https://www.jpost.com/Blogs/Torah-Commentaries/Metaphors-in-the-Torah-The-Role-of-the-Blood-and-the-Liver-in-Removing-Sin-390469 .

7 Anon. ‘Hey Diddle Diddle’, English nursery rhyme, Roud Folk Song Index # 19478, c. 1765.

8 Pran, Dith, and Kim DePaul Children of Cambodia's Killing Fields, Yale University Press, 1997.

Nurses’ Standard English Communication Difficulties: Native Undergraduate and Non-Native

Introduction

1. Workplace

2. On the job

3. Wellbeing

4. Nurses’ role                                                                                                                 

5. Error

6. Stuffing

7. Standard English

8. Role hierarchy

9. Discrimination

Conclusion

Introduction

The shortage of registered nurses is a global issue; it’s especially difficult to recruit and retain RNs in the United Kingdom’s National Health Service (NHS), because opportunities are better elsewhere. Despite a dearth of UK research, understanding motivation and experience is key in the employing and supporting of nurses in the workplace. In recent years, the gap has been apparent on education programs (Beitz, 2019); decreasing new graduate interest in, and awareness of, employment opportunities.

 With regard to communication, education is distinguishable as a central theme. Subsidiary themes include; workplace culture and teamwork; mental wellbeing; nurses’ perceptions of their role; the impact of the working environment on individuals and teams; training, acquisition of skills and competencies; communication and emotional intelligence; directly negative impacts of bullying and aggression, and the potential for influence of external factors, such as background noise, for example, music, which positively soothes some and negatively enrages others.

 Studies focusing broadly on safety (Howell, 2015), and the impact on the wellbeing of nurses and patients (Eskola et al, 2016: 2), observe that for nurses’ communities within workplace culture, ‘... shared structures, routines, rules and norms that serve to guide and constrain behavior ..’, communication is of most concern.

1. Workplace

 Central is hospital teamwork (Sonoda et al, 2018) in addressing patients’ vulnerability, and dangers arising from potential error, because of attendant risk. As improved organisation and administration of work environments fosters effective teamwork (Bradley and Griffin, 2016), English language teaching (ELT) is indicated as essential for non-English speaking nursing staff.

 Schwa is a most common sound. So, if you want to sound natural and clear, you need to know how and when to use it. Schwa, written as ǝ in the sound alphabet, that is, phonetics, is a relaxed sound used when pronouncing unstressed vowels in words. It’s normal if you’ve never heard about it before, because it’s not a letter but a sound, ‘uh’, and helps the stressed vowel sound. Without schwa pronunciation is clipped and unnatural with over-pronounced unstressed sounds that are misunderstandable, for example, hospitǝl isn’t pronounced hospitæl, which is an ‘ah’ sound, rather than an ‘uh’, while the æ sound is a common error with Mittel Europe peons.

 Not pronouncing the ‘th’ sounds, voiced and voiceless fricatives, that is, dental sounds, means you need to place your tongue gently between your teeth to pronounce correctly, with the tongue behind the teeth, for example, leather (ð), made only with air, and thing (θ), made with vibration. Many non-native speakers pronounce them as /t/, which is incorrect and unfamiliar, for example, instead of ‘theatre’ with some non-native speakers it’s ‘teater’.

 Syllable stress is important in speaking English. If not stressed correctly, speech isn’t clearly understandable. Stress can change meaning, for example, if the first syllable is stressed (Toçi, A., 2020: 116), PREsent means ‘here’ (noun), for example, the nurse has the surgical tools, whereas if the last syllable is stressed, preSENT can refer to the surgeon’s holding the surgical tools in readiness.

 English doesn’t sound natural; unless the speaker is able to use ‘reduced speech’, which compacts words, for example: ‘catheter’ pronounced ‘car theatre’ isn’t a clarifying reduction. Blending sounds together, for example, bedpan, is more natural sounding than bed pan, here the /d/ sound is blended into the /p/ sound, be*pan, that is, ‘Would you like a b*pan?’ Using schwa for unstressed vowels, for example, bədpən, that is, buhdpuhn, and contractions such as don’ for don’t, are unnatural reductions productive of a lack of clarity that hinders communication and right action.

 As with stress, intonation is a key factor in non-native English speaking.  Not using intonation when asking questions, for example, causes unnatural sounds, for example, with WH- questions (what, who, when, where) , voice is pitched down at the last, which is falling intonation: ‘What are you DOing?’ ↘ With questions that can be answered with a negative or an affirmative, pitch rises, that is, rising intonation: ‘Are you coMING?’ ↗ Obviously incorrect intonation is productive of confusion, for example, ‘Where are you go[W]ING?’ Of course the same can be said of UK dialects, for example, in the northern county of Yorkshire, England, ‘Wh’ is’t tha’ GO, Win’?’ I don’t know who Win is.

 Most commonly, incorrect pronunciation of ‘the’, which is found in almost every spoken English sentence, sounds unnatural to native speakers, for example, if the following word starts with a consonant, schwa is pronounced; thǝ book. However, if the following word starts with a vowel, /iy/ is sounded, that is, thiy end. Unnatural examples would include th/ǝ/ǝ/tre, that is, th-uh-uh-tre, for th/iy/tre (theatre).

 In hospitals pronunciation problems can be the result of tiredness, rather than laziness, which results in slowness of speech resembling brain damage, or quickness of speech indicating the desire to resemble efficiency when memory impairment, because of exhaustion, intrudes on effective action.

Fig.1 Phonetic alphabet chart

 Referring to the international phonetic alphabet (IPA), English sounds are unique, for example, the upside down ‘r’ in phonetic notation is used to describe words where the sound remains unpronounced (see Figure 1), for example, nɹ̩s for nurse, which though clear to native speakers in the United States, might be met with blank looks in the UK. To what extent US pronunciation is attractive, because of Asian difficulties in pronouncing ‘l’ instead of ‘r’, remains moot, but it’s clear that nulse isn’t going to be pronounced if nurse has a soundless ‘r’ as in nɹ̩s, which is standard American English, while such Asian pronunciation in UK hospitals remains problematic for its native speakers.

2. On the job

 Radford and Fotis (2018) found the experiences of nurses heavily influenced by organisational culture; service pressures produced by NHS cuts; managers’ teaching methods, and amount of time available for Continuing Professional Development (CPD). Strengthening interpersonal relations and teamwork; continuing education in communicative work, and collective decision-making, for example, regular meetings, addressing NHS service issues, required an educational platform: especially relevant to non-native speakers of English and those for whom improvement in standard English was a priority issue. According to Chang et al (2017) friendly communication environments are optimal; smoothing conflict through openness and clear communication: eliciting change. Mediating peer relations minimised workplace incidents (Purpora and Blegen, 2015); regardless of gender, ethnicity, or education level. Impact on team dynamics from stress through conflict (Smith et al, 2018), revealed communication was essential protection for patients potentially harmed by misunderstandings arising from mispronunciation and poor command of English language.

 Strengthening employees’ interpersonal skills prevented communication issues (Clayton, Isaacs and Ellender, 2016), identified in NHS reports as vital for the ‘safety of care’ (NHS, 2017: 5). Kaldheim and Slettebø (2016) found ‘failure to communicate’, a phrase, made infamous by the prison guard, actor Strother Martin, while addressing actor Paul Newman as Lucas ‘Luke’ Jackson, part of a chain gang in leg irons, in the movie Cool Hand Luke (1967), and apposite. Non-collaborative behavior, such as impatience, made nurses feel degraded. For Sandelin et al (2019), dialogue was a sine qua non, while Matziou et al (2014) found physicians’ non-understanding of nurses’ perceptions of their role in decision-making processes as negatively impacting on patient outcomes.

 As health service doctors were often immigrants from the Asian subcontinents of India or Pakistan, that is, Hindu and Moslem, used to being in conflict with their neighbor on religious grounds, because Islam is monotheist, while Hinduism is polytheistic, together with a propensity for misogyny, as evidenced by the problem posed by the Taliban regime in Afghanistan, that prior to 9/11, 2001, had provided a  locale for the training of the Islamic extremist terror group, Al Qaeda, which hijacked civil airliners to crash into the Twin Towers of the World Trade Centre in New York and other targets, so representing an additional source of conflict in a workplace setting where nursing staff, primarily young women seeking permanent careers, experienced nebulous feelings of intimidation: un-resolvable for on-native speakers.

 Dror Ben Ami, writing in The Jerusalem Post (2015), has a not uncommon explication of the meaning of Jesus’ death, which amounts to an extreme religious terrorist perspective, ‘Paul of Tarsus never said that the animal sacrifices of the Jews didn’t remove sins. To the contrary: he agreed they removed sins. The point Paul of Tarsus was trying to make was that the blood sacrifice of Jesus was a more effective way to remove sins, because it was only needed once, whereas Jewish blood sacrifices needed to be repeated year after year.’

 Doubtless, the killers of 6,000, 000 Jews, and the builders of the ovens to burn the corpses in ‘death camps’ at northern Belsen, lower Saxony,  southern Dachau, Bavaria, and Auschwitz, Lesser Poland (Małopolska) province, southern Poland, for example, during the period of power exercised by National Socialism’s (Nazism’s) democratically elected leader, Adolf Hitler, in Germany’s failed Second World War (1939-45) to enslave the human race for blood sacrifice, felt better.

 The concept of human death within a hospital framework, as being necessary for the redemption of the sins of the religious, is anathema, while the belief in human death as a redemptive act on the part of the psychopathic killer seems to have become a universalized abomination antithetical to the basic principles of the Bible and Christianity, which for Jesus, the Messiah, was ‘Love your neighbour as you love yourself.’ (Mk: 12. 31)  The point about Jesus being killed, as a dissident Jew, was his resurrection and ascension to heaven afterwards; despite being sacrificed like an animal.

 Ben Ami’s argument is that Jesus, ‘Christ’, ‘the chosen’, was born and raised, as the ‘special one’; a blood offering in Satanism to appease ‘the god of this world’, who was then Emperor Tiberius Augustus of Rome, but any ghoul with cash for ‘snuff’ movies, that is, the recorded killing of people for entertainment, in the modern era, so that the voyeur and coward can experience the feel good factor too amongst the collective herd by Mr Average: Satan. The promise in Jesus’ resurrection and ascension to heaven was salvation and redemption for the slain, and eternal unendurable pain (perdition) for the evil, as God’s punishment for their sin of murder. Ben Ami’s advocating the categorization of non-Jews as animals to be killed for ‘the chosen people’ to improve their ‘feel good factor’. In the tower of Babel that is the nurses’ teaching hospital framework, it’s pertinent to explain that nurses and patients aren’t patiently waiting for the me tax.

 A feature of nursing is learning on the job (Radford and Fotis, 2018) to acquire a broader skills set. Although feelings of anxiety are reducible through preparation (Willemsen-McBride, 2010), for Lydon and Burke (2012) mentorship was associated with negative learning experiences; feelings of inadequacy and exclusion. Crafoord and Fagerdahl (2018) found newly graduated nurses disaffected with clinical learning environments, supervised by mentors who, promoting clinical depression in the learners, rejected their point of view. Pupkiewicz et al (2015) found themes relating to novice and senior nurses’ perceptions of training; challenges to proficiency; fear; expectations; need for support, and adaptation. As the aim is to conceive change conducive to learning, nurses’ dependence on senior staff's ability to effectively mentor is the issue.

3. Wellbeing

 Nurses, regularly exposed to patient suffering, risk burnout, that is, mental health disorder through stress (Yaribeygi et al, 2017: 1057). Considered from a physiological perspective, stress, as well as exposure to the Cov-SARS 2 virus, becoming a global epidemic, after its discovery at a Wuhan city hospital, Hubei province, China, in December 2019, affects brain function, that is, adverse memory retention, and cognitive brain damage, which prevents learning. The crucial relation is between brain functioning and job satisfaction. Driving people to develop the skills needed to cope, that is, adapt to new situations, is stressful for those with impaired brain function, (Singh et al, 2018). In other words, the driver causes stress, because it’s brain damaging; so the trainee remains permanently educable, which is the aim of the religious demon, who wants the sheepish and the cowed for their self-sacrificing nature; beside and upon the altars of their operating theatres.

 Deng et al (2019: 2) differentiate between two types of stress; hindrance and challenge: ‘Challenge stress refers to the job stress that individuals feel they can overcome, and that benefits their career development; such as job load, job responsibility, and time urgency. Hindrance stress [is] … stress that individuals feel they cannot overcome, and which prevents their career development; such as role conflict, organisational politics, and work insecurity.’ While English language learning is in the category, ‘challenge stress’, training per se promotes hindrance, because slave systems prefer brain damage. Burnout, that is, mental collapse, through prolonged periods of psychological and physical strain, occurs because slavers don’t want communication, but rather loss of information, perceived as ‘hindrance stress’, and ultimate loss of motivation for the sacrificial enslaved.

 A major mediator of burnout is the personality that resists enslavement, that is, contrary to widely held belief, based on training providers’ self-publicizing, the human isn’t extravert, agreeable, conscientious, and/or open to experience. Perez-Fuentes et al (2019), utilizing the Brief Burnout Questionnaire (CBB), that is, Netherlands’ organisational psychologist Wilmar Schaufeli’s (2000) Utrecht Work Engagement Scale (UWES), ostensibly designed to determine vigor, dedication and absorption levels in terms of workers’ engagement with their role, and The Big Five Inventory-10 (BFI-10), which is a single minute test measuring extroversion, agreeableness, openness, neuroticism, and conscientiousness, found above-mean neuroticism, that is, slave-driving produces a disposition of neurotics on the verge of burnout, experiencing ‘... anger, anxiety, self‐consciousness, irritability, emotional instability, and depression.’ (Oltmanns et al 2018: 144) Those displaying neurosis tended toward ‘depression and anxiety’, and ‘irritability and anger’. (Brandes and Tackett, 2019: 238) As the ability to communicate in English is an anti-slavery sine qua non for non-English speakers, as well as native-speaking nursing undergraduates in NHS teaching hospitals, ELT has a positive role to play.

 Lack of effective communication, that is, nurses not being able to speak up regarding patient safety issues, together with management’s perceived unwillingness to assess communication failure, resulted in increased risk of stress-based disease; for example, Tang et al (2013) identified interpersonal relations as the fourth most prevalent source of such illnesses; after workload, time pressure, and management issues. Consequences of a lack of effective communication in preparation for tasks, such as those requiring complex and specialised skills (Vowels et al, 2012), are serious. Utilizing the views and experiences of abused nurses was indicated as best supportive practice. However, being able to communicate in English was a requisite to which non-native speakers hadn’t recourse.

 As stress is a trigger factor in nurses' absenteeism, caused by high-intensity communications, and related organisational factors, ELT for non-English speakers is a priority. The main causes are mental, and behavioral disorder; manifesting as diseases of the musculoskeletal system and connective tissue (Mininel et al, 2013: 1293-1294). Predominant factors are physiological, that is, uncomfortable, or inappropriate, positions during work, which along with psychic workloads; restrictive supervision; abuse, and lack of a collective defence, are ameliorable for native and non-English speakers through ELT course programs; offering stress-relieving role play orthopedically assisted to ease interpersonal conflict through improved communication:

Dr: ‘Hi Jessica. How are you feeling today?’

Nurse: ‘A bit better.’

Dr: ‘That's good to hear. Are you still feeling nauseous?’

Nurse: ‘No, I haven't felt sick to my stomach since you switched my medication.’

Dr: ‘Great. Say, your test results came in this morning.’

Nurse: ‘It's about time. Is it good news or bad?’

Dr: ‘I guess it's a bit of both. Which do you want first?’

Nurse: ‘Let's get the bad news over with.’

Dr: ‘Okay. It looks like you're going to need surgery to remove the lump from your abdomen. After the operation you're going to have to stay off your feet for at least three weeks. That means no soccer.’

Nurse: ‘I was afraid you were going to say that.’

Dr: ‘Now for the good news. It's not cancerous. We're going to take it out anyway just to be on the safe side.’

Nurse: ‘Wow, that's a load off my mind. Thanks Doctor.’

Dr: ‘Don't get too excited. We still need to get to the bottom of all of this weight loss.’

Nurse: ‘I've probably just been so worried about this stupid lump.’

Dr: ‘These things often are stress related, but we're still going to do a few blood tests just to rule a few things out.’

Nurse: ‘Things like what?’

Dr: ‘I'm thinking along the lines of some sort of parasite.’

 According to Social Identity Theory (Hogg, 2016), groups thrive on self-improvement, and Role Theory (McGarvey et al, 2004), that is, acting out socially defined categories, such as that of doctor and nurse, which is what ELT does.

4. Nurses’ role

 In violation of its social norms, nurses who protest at workshift schedules are punished by their society, which is harmful to patient outcomes. However, offering support into nurses’ concerns over breakdowns, in useful communication ‘role play’ (RP) through ELT, effects improvement through SIT methods, as a normative exercise in conflict management, rather than have vulnerable nursing staff appear attractive to the punitive.

 For Karanikola et al (2018), as worth appraisal depends on positive feelings associated with clinical effectiveness and adequacy, for example, perceptions of themselves as having a ‘mission’, as part of an in-group, nurses’ self-worth can be collectively strengthened through SIT improvements allied to ELT RP.

 Ethnographically, McGarry et al (2018) examined non-native speakers’ descriptions of their role, and the extent to which their behavior and practice, that is, RP, corresponded. Momentum of people and needed equipment was a key theme. Between ‘flow’, that is, attending, and safety, tensions could be alleviated through ELT based RP allied to SIT self-improvement.

 In terms of systemic, organisational impact, according to the Systems Engineering Initiative for Patient Safety (SEIPS) model, nurses’ workload produces cognitive reductions, particularly during training (Oblak and Skela-Savič, 2017); deleterious in terms of patient outcomes (Silerro and Zabalegui, 2018). Any ELT approach decreasing workload would already have achieved a notable objective.

5. Error

 Keers et al (2013) found interruptions from non-native speaking colleagues resulting in wrong site surgery; retained foreign objects, and insertion of the wrong implant or prosthesis (NHS, 2017). For Serou et al, 2017, surgical incidents cause loss of self-confidence. ELT based SIT and RP reduced such effects by supporting discussion; resulting in the implementation of changes in practice. Pratt et al (2012) found  nurses feeling  ‘depressed’, ‘fearful’, and/or ‘guilty’ (Chard and Tovin, 2018: 75), because of error, which led to avoidance and denial strategies. Without improved SIT based planning, for those who find contact confrontational, because it requires language they don’t have, errors repeat (Cabilan and Kynoch, 2017); resulting in job loss. This is counteracted in non-English speakers, and standard English speaking natives with communication difficulties, because of stress and burnout, for example, by prescribing a gentle ELT course with therapeutic RP:

1 Why did Jessica switch medication?

a) The parasite gave her a lump

b) She was allergic to the parasite

c) The parasite upset her stomach

2 What bad news does the doctor give her?

a) The parasite had given her a lump

b) The lump had given her a parasite

c) The parasite was a lump

3 What medical procedure has Jessica already undergone?

a) It wasn’t a medical procedure

b) Pest control

c) Physical examination

6. Stuffing

 Concerning numbers of staff working in individual units, Kalisch, Russell, and Lee (2013) noted smaller nursing teams as more cohesive. There was reduced physical distance, which closeness improved communication, so suggesting the usefulness of small groups in RP and SIT based ELT programs. Eskola et al (2016) attributed person-centeredness as necessary to efficient communication. Closeness revealed individual nursing team members’ strengths and weaknesses, while communications made for more efficiency and procedurally adeptness. SIT and RP based ELT, focusing on ‘improvement in action’, as ‘person-centring’, made individuals more responsible. While financial constraints, under which the NHS operates, means nurses generally fulfil their role as part of a reduced team, it’s paradoxically useful for ELT provision, as small groups facilitate that efficiency of communication which is dependent on person-centeredness.

7. Standard English

 The Health Foundation (2019) report into NHS staffing trends found 24% of those starting nursing degrees did not complete, which indicates poor standard English language skills. According to the 2015 NHS Staff Survey, 72% worked extra hours, which suggests working longer shifts to keep jobs otherwise incapable of, because of role illiteracy, which ELT emphasis on SIT and RP ameliorates, at least with regard to non-native speakers. There’s a need for implementing a combined standard English language and English as a foreign language (EFL) program. Trajano et al (2017) found interpersonal relationships strengthened in coping collectively through work, which suggests the validity of a SIT based program implementation; focusing on interpersonal RP and communicative skills.

8. Role hierarchy

 Higgins and Macintosh (2010) identify role hierarchy as a source of abuse of nurses; the negative psychological results having a deleterious effect on patient-safety. Conflict and aggression within team dynamics, according to Bezemer et al, (2016), arise from a lack of role understanding, for example, nursing requests are perceived by surgeons as disruptive, rather than enabling. As resonant leadership decreases negative outcome, such as stress and burnout (Fallatah and Laschinger, 2016), for Yin et al (2018) a human-oriented approach is indicated, for example, RP guiding others, where it’s important in terms of de-personalization to  mitigate managerial style. As an exclusionary practice, Johnson (2016) viewed gossip as fostering schizophrenia, that is, bullying creates a second unwanted personality, who has to respond. Managers’ role in dealing with discrimination and bullying is critical in addressing communications and conflict, where the utility of RP is evident. Where mistreatment is evident, burnout occurs. Absence of bullying is the legitimate sign of peer support, which RP can enable through ‘role modelling’ (RM) adopted by staff to defuse volatility:

Dr: ‘Hi.’

Nurse: ‘Hi.’

Dr: ‘Do you have a minute?’

Nurse: ‘Sure, what’s up?’

Dr: ‘Nothing so far. I need a favor.’

Nurse: ‘What?’

Dr: ‘It’s a small one.’

Nurse: ‘Small?’

Dr: ‘Yes, very small.’

Nurse:  ‘What is it?’

Dr: ‘Well, I need to show you something, and I want you to promise not to get mad.’

Nurse: ‘Uh oh. What did you do?’

Dr: ‘It’s small.’

Nurse: ‘Fine, I promise.’

9. Discrimination

 Discrimination relates to cultural differences; linked to burnout. Due to NHS problems with finance, a dense population of international nurses found it of benefit to move to the UK, escalating multiculturalism within workforces, which unguided led to breakdown in peer relations. SIT based solutions, as applied by Hewstone and Rubin (1998), improved in-group discriminatory behavior and conflict, that is, where minimals discriminate to maintain their own positive social identity, while learning professional body language, providing RP facilitates more appropriate responses. (Bambi et al, 2017)

 Batnitzky et al (2011) focused on migrant nurses from Caribbean and Asian countries. Post-1945 ethnic minorities were stereotypically restricted from engaging with vital specialist nurses’ training, for example, conceived as an obstacle to career advancement and professional recognition, according to Baptiste, M. (2015), labor stratification negatively impacted on patient care, because for nationalists racism is a transcendent ideological perspective.

 Clayton, Isaacs, and Ellender (2016), focusing on multicultural communications within a nursing group, found ‘failure to communicate’, amongst the chain gang in leg irons, impairing patient care, that is, the denial of specialized training, based on ethnicity, threatened patients safety in the style of terrorism, while integration, through social gathering, was neutralizing, rather than empowering. Although Schilgen et al (2017) observed migrant nurses built a sense of community by sharing commonalities, patient safety was a concern, because such ethnic minority groupings, while protective of their own status, neglected the impact on patient safety of a covering up of their own paucity of English language communication skills. For Oikarainen et al (2019) such educational interventions as ELT RP could assist staff developing cultural competence.

Conclusion

 Language barriers, in adjusting to workplace practices (Yu et al, 2018), are allied to communication barriers, because of personal and professional differences, producing illness and/or timidity in task completion, which issues are resolvable in ELT; promoting listening to, and understanding of, undergraduate nursing trainees and non-native English language speaking nursing staff.

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Smart Plank Boarding: ELT Isn’t Apolitical

The term ‘waterboarding’ became quite well known, as a form of torture used during the Gulf wars with Moslem Iraq, and for the interrogating of prisoners, especially those suspected of being terrorists, at the United States’ Guantanamo Bay detention center facility on the Caribbean island of Cuba, south of the southern coast state of Florida, originally seized by the Christian US during its support for Cuba’s independence in the April 21^st-August 13^th 1898 Spanish-American war, before Cuba’s signing of a lease, giving the use of ‘Gitmo’ as a ‘coaling and Navy station’1 in 1903, in exchange for the US guaranteeing Cuba’s independence.

 However, the 17^th-20^th April, 1961, military defeat at the ‘Bay of Pigs’, during the US’ Central Intelligence Agency (CIA)  funded volunteer Cuban exiles’ 2506 Brigade invasion by sea at the inlet of the Gulf of Cazones, located on Cuba’s southern coast, which failed to overthrow the Communist regime of President Fidel Castro, didn’t pass muster with the member states of the United Nations (UN) as fostering Cuban freedom, while Russia took the opportunity in May, 1962, to place medium range theatre of war, R-12 Dvina (Двина), ballistic missiles on Cuba, capable of delivering nuclear weapons against the US, on the understanding they were defending Cuban independence, which almost led to a ‘hot’ war, and aside from his extra-marital affair with movie star, Marilyn Monroe, as Lorelei Lee singing ‘Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend’ in Gentleman Prefer Blondes (1953), undoubtedly contributed to the killing of then US President John ‘Jack’ F. Kennedy in Dallas, Texas, by unknown sniper, on November 22^nd, 1963, allegedly from a ‘grassy knoll’ near Dealey Plaza, shot in the back and head, while traveling backseat with wife, Jaqueline ‘Jackie’ née Bouvier, in an open top 1961 Lincoln Continental, made by the Ford Motor Company, code named X-100 by the Secret Service, along crowd lined Elm Street, as part of a formal motorcade:

‘A kiss on the hand

May be quite continental,

But diamonds are a girl's best friend.’2

 The use of ‘smartboarding’ by the unscrupulous, to torture and interrogate teachers, in order to gain access to property and facilities, though deployed in a way similar to waterboarding, isn’t so widely comprehended. Waterboarding, of course, simulates drowning by stuffing wet cloth into the mouths of the tortured in order to obtain information, for example, about terrorist activity. Typical smartboarding is students asking, ‘Are you alone here?’ and teachers replying, as happened to me in Moslem Kyrgyzstan’s Batken region, ruggedly independent from Moscow, since August 31^st, 1991, and where everything officially is still written unofficially in the Russian Cyrillic script, ‘With you, tovarisch, loneliness is never a consideration to be entertained for very long.’

Fig. 1 Kyrgyzs Manas was the first khagan of the Yenisei Khaganate

 In the city of Kadamjay’s (КАДАМЖАЙ) ‘Semetey’, named for the son of legendary Manas (d. 711 C.E.), 7^th century first khagan of the Yenisei Kyrgyz Khaganate (see Figure 1), the Sapat schools’ lyceum for boys is Turkish-Kyrgyz, so explaining my ‘smartboarding’ by İstanbul Sabiha Gökçen (SAW) airport baggage controllers, who mugged me for what ELT teachers are, presumably, unwittingly for, that is, transporting disassembled multi-headed screwdriver bits (see Figure 2), costing in Kyrgyzstan roughly the equivalent of $ US 1.05 ¢ (100 Kyrgyzs Som), which laptop maintenance equipage I might never be able to afford again upon my return to Europe to perforce give up, as a late Eastern Orthodox, 7^th January, Xmas gift, to luggage inspection, hopefully without incurring any more turkey; unorthodox, or the usual gobbler’s.

 After an umpteenth lesson observation, this time by no one associated with the Semetey school at all, but who wanted the job I’d only started in Autumn 2021, I was asked, ‘Do you have family?’ Somewhat peeved, subsequent to an earlier impromptu ‘ob’, before parents, some wearing the traditional Moslem Turkish-Kyrgyzs high crowned, distinguishingly decorated, Al (white) Kalpak, cap (see Figure 3), who ‘just thought they’d show up’ for a Solutions Elementary, Unit 3, ‘Style’, Exercise 2, page 32, ‘Read the Tweets: find the name, date and location of the music festival they are describing’, at my 7^th grade English language class, 1^st floor, room 206, in no mood for small talk, I’d replied ‘No, so you can’t shoot ‘em.’ ‘We do,’ he said. Jobs with the obviously boys.

Fig. 2 Multi bit screwdriver set

 Waterboarding concerned the US, subsequent to the hijacking of civil airliners on September 11, 2001, by the Moslem extremist Al Qaeda group, ‘the base’, led by Saudi Arabian business heir, Osama Ben Laden, formerly based in Khartoum, Sudan (1992-96), before the US’ bombing there of the reputedly chemical weapons factory, al-Shifa, and after the successful, with Moslem Saudi ‘Wahhabi’ support, war against officially atheist Russia’s USSR (1979-89). Laden, along with 35,000 Saudi ‘Wahhabi’, financially assisted by rich royals, ‘The House of Saud’, and after praying in Mecca, at the holy shrine of Abraham, the burka box (see Figure 4), Ka’ Ba, for better meat inside their burger bar drive-in buns, fought and won, but astonishingly lost their beef with McDonald’s; the children more at home to the Disney tie in, ‘Ferdinand The Bull’,3 promotional butcher’s film.

 Muhammad ibn ʿAbd al-Wahhab (1703-1792 C.E.) founded Wahhabism, the ultra-conservative Sunni branch of Islam, which ostensibly replaced the worship of Baal, the bull god, with the Koran (610-30 C.E.) of the Prophet Mohamed (570-632 C.E.), dictated by the angels of God, according to Islamic tradition, and distinct from the Shia branch of Islam, founded by the Prophet Mohamed’s putative successor, cousin and son-in-law, ʿAlī ibn Abī  Ṭālib (c. 600-661 C.E.).

 Laden’s relocated Al Qaeda, on 9/11, 2001, operating under the auspices of the notoriously misogynist Moslem Taliban regime of Kabul, Afghanistan, trained militarily by Moslem Pakistan’s inter-services Intelligence (ISI), was toppled through US’ army invasion by December 30^th, 2001, but the Taliban reinstated themselves, after guerilla war with the mainly Protestant British (52%) and Americans (43%),4 that is, those who believe that God’s business is with them, rather than with the Catholics’ Pope in Rome, by August 18^th, 2021, so causing distress to many hundreds of ecumenically trapped ELT professionals forced to live there in fear for their lives.

 They’d become used to it since Bosnia’s war with Herzegovina (1992-95), during the break-up of the former Soviet Empire’s artificial super-state, Yugoslavia, and the internecine genocide perpetrated by Christian Serbs against approximately 8,000 Moslem Bosniak men and boys in the town of Srebrenica, Republika Srpska, for example. The UK, after sending ELT professionals throughout the globe, subsequent to the high street bank (Lloyds, Barclays, etc.) grant funded training for business programs, which Universities and colleges perforce had to adapt to in 1998, after the collapse of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics (CCCP), with the declaration of a supposedly liberal, modern, business-oriented Russian Federation in 1991, withdrew from the EU at 23.00 GMT on January 31^st, 2020, so avenging themselves on the pre-bank funded free education ‘spongers’, that is, the bums they’d made homeless, after sending them to be perceived as whores by foreign students complaining they weren’t getting enough from the hour that they’d paid for.

Fig. 3 Al Kapak wearers

 On 9/11, 2001, two planes, AA Flight 11 and UA Flight 175 en route to L.A. (LAX), hijacked at Boston, Logan airport, Massachusetts, were crashed, within an hour of each other by Al Qaeda terrorist hijackers, amongst them operational leader, Egyptian Mohamed Atta, who amongst others had studied at Huffman Aviation, Venice Municipal Airport, Florida state, into the Twin Towers of the World Trade Center, Lower Manhattan, city of New York’s Manhattan Island, New York state, and AA Flight 77 en route to L.A. (LAX), hijacked at Dulles airport, Washington D.C., was crashed into the building housing the Defense Department, city of Arlington, Virginia state. The WTC was penetrated at 8.46 am (North Tower), and 9.03 am (South Tower), and a wall of the Pentagon at 9.37 am (West side) that ill-fated Tuesday morning.

 A fourth plane, UA 93 en route to San Francisco (SFO), hijacked at Newark Liberty airport, New Jersey, reputedly on course for President George W. Bush Jnr’s official Whitehouse residence in Washington D.C., was wrested from terrorist control by passengers and crew over Indian Lake, Shanksville, Pennsylvania state, crashing at 10.03 am in a field near a reclaimed coal strip mine, Diamond T., owned b  y PBS Coals, Stonycreek Township, Somerset County, which resulted in the US authorizing the interrogation of detained terrorist suspects, as an emergency measure, at its globally located CIA ‘black sites’, which might explain the UK’s offloading of its ‘free love’ hippies abroad in ELT programs, after 1998’s growing belief that they’d freeloaded for decades, as what the US were pleased to call in the 1960s, unemployable ‘long hair pinko commie faggots’, for example, as evinced in Charlie Daniels ‘redneck’ lyrics to ‘Uneasy Rider’ from the Charlie Daniels Band pre-Soviet collapse, Honey in the Rock (1973), album:

‘Well, he's a friend of them long haired, hippy-type, pinko fags!

I betchya he's even got a commie flag

tacked up on the wall inside of his garage.’5

 In predominantly Roman Catholic Poland (92.8%),6 according to news agencies, there were black sites for those with concerns about loved ones whereabouts engaged in ELT provision on the former ‘Cold War’ (1945-89) battlefields of Eastern Europe, post-Brexit snows, where detention of suspects by Russia’s Soviet Union and its satellite states, such as Christian Poland, was opposed by application of US’ President Harry Truman’s ‘Truman Doctrine’, containing the spread of Communism, and enforced between March 12^th, 1947 and December 26^th, 1991, when Russia’s Eastern bloc collapsed, before its reemergence as a Federation, seeking admittance to the economic and political European Union, and thence to membership of the western defense alliance, the North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO); Albania, Belgium, Bulgaria, Canada, Croatia, the Czech Republic, Denmark, Estonia, France, Germany, Greece, Hungary, Iceland, Italy, Latvia, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Montenegro, the Netherlands, North Macedonia, Norway, Poland, Portugal, Romania, Slovakia, Slovenia, Spain, Turkey, the United Kingdom, and the United States of America.

 Smartboarding requires access to a ‘plank’, which is a generic term for an unwitting stooge, for example, Huffman Aviation, Venice, Fla., which unwittingly trained Mohamed Atta as the AA Flight 11 pilot, American Airlines, themselves duped (North Tower, Pentagon), and United Airlines (South Tower, Shanksville), and/or what businessmen call ‘a mason’s fool’, that is, someone who isn’t aware of the role they play, but it’s played out because it has its use. Many University graduates from England, for example, were recruited as planks, that is, trained in teaching English as a foreign language (EFL), so that they could be sent overseas; as proxy school boarders for businesses with vested interests amounting to those of pirates. Standing smart and bored in front of the smart board, and the bored, with or without smarts, the ELT professional represented the gangplank, that is, the plank over which the gang board, like privateers listening to some voice from another shore, an aspect of another state's economy.

Fig. 4 The shrine of Abraham, Ka’ Ba, Mecca, KSA, with bull’s shoe

 The Cov-SARS 2 virus, which made a large proportion of English language teaching professionals redundant, both in the sense that they couldn’t work abroad, because of epidemiological restrictions, and/or their unfamiliarity with the usability of online technologies to provide ELT, which was beyond the scope of many formerly employed to give language lessons only in the classroom, was an aspect of the firers, that is, those employers who wanted to be rid of the planks, so that the bored meat was more regular and accepting of whatever motion was tabled.

 Monitored by educational institutions on a global scale, ELT’s surviving exponents in the art of passing a motion, although students prefer to call it, ‘walking the plank’ between classrooms, were subjected to the online version of the Cov-SARS 2 virus, the firers, seeking to get the gang aboard over the burning plank, embarrassed, red faced, and generally overheated with confusion, as to what was so important about ensuring that each of the online guests to the virtual classroom wear Porky Pig (see Figure 5) face masks,7 while attempting to elicit significance from the educator’s mumblings, almost inaudible behind his/her own oral ‘codpiece’,* with its mandatory Chilly Willy designer imagery,8 because they’ve seen that the plank’s been inculcating learning, which is the reason for the firers, who want their own people amongst the bored members, and don’t abhor the deployment of an inexpensive ‘biological warfare suit’; if it assists in the smart borers achieving that.

 After the plank has been walked, the marchers amongst the students having struck, the firers inside the local skulls, sporting their codpieces before their mouths, tacitly refusing oral examinations, remain uncontaminated nationalists, preserving the integrity of their linguistic heritage, against the efforts of the infidel to pollute their minds, with alternatively useful modes of expressivity, favored by the speech requirements of the United States of America’s business-savvy weltanschauung, because they believe in slavery for intellectual ‘long hairs,’ who think they can make a difference to the planet; changing the world they live in, so to experience that which is indefinably unique for every person: happiness.

Fig. 5 Porky Pig face mask

 The small bores in the skullroom, joined by larger, meaner, more cost-conscious, managerial bores, at first fire only planks, replacing them with bores that are bigger and more suited to the needs of the economist for holes of their own sort. In Saudi Arabia, for example, Universities were green, if employing mainly Saudis, and bloody oranges, if they employed some few foreigners to teach English, but bright red, if the numbers of planks, without the firers, were too high.

 The ‘traffic light' system was applied by nation states globally, after the severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) was discovered at a hospital in Wuhan city, which housed the Chinese/American company, Lenovo, provider of artificially intelligent (AI) traffic lights,9 in Hubei Province, Communist China, on December 1^st, 2019. Lenovo donated to Wuhan emergency hospital facilities, ‘traffic light’ IT to monitor, and so control, the spread of the virus,10 debilitating to the natural human brain, during the pandemic, while escalations were indicated by labeling countries red, for no-go, orange for those in transition, after the anti-virus (AV) vaccine against Covid-19 was administered, and green-for-go video.

 According to structural anthropologist, Claude Lévi-Strauss (1908-2009), traffic lights are structural, that is, a part of nature,11 which finds correspondence in the structure of the human brain. Thinking in traffic light terms, brains that are damaged require more external direction, which English democratic socialist writer, George Orwell, in his critique of totalitarianism, 1984 (1948), called ‘Big Brother’. As the brain damaged planks lost ground to the firers, so they couldn’t star in the  company video (Co., Vid.), because they’d been stopped in ‘the red light district’, the company of the bored grew, almost as fast as the bores, gathering around the halls of their Chambers of Commerce, could fire us.

Fig. 6 Naryn mosque, Naryn region, Kyrgyzstan

 Business and Christianity go hand in hand in western civilization and culture. However, three world wars in the 20^th century; the First with the German Christian Empire (1914-18); the Second with disaffected National Socialist (Nazi) Germany (1939-45), smarting after defeat, and the Third with Iraq, a supporter of Germany in WWII, beginning with the first Gulf war (1990-91), after dictator Saddam Hussein’s army invaded fellow Moslem state, Kuwait, for its oil, and continuing against ISIL, the Independent State of Islam in the Levant, subsequent to the US invasion of Iraq in March 2003, when Saddam Hussein, consequent to 9/11, 2001, offered bases to Al Qaeda there, was more suggestive of the shadow of the vampire, that is, property thieves (businessmen) benefiting from the deaths of the children they’d grown for war, which image, strengthened by the specter of the US’ B2 Spirit ‘stealth’ bomber, flew like a bat in its own darkness, dropping ‘blockbusters’ on the humanity cowering in fear beneath its wings.

Fig. 7 Sphinx with Cheops

 The mosques of the Moslems of the nations of Islam are gigantic in human terms (see Figure 6), as they’re mausoleums (Moslems). Despite western assertions that the mansion, manse, mausoleum progression is from life to spirituality in preparation for death’s tomb, amongst the Moslems in the Middle East and elsewhere, mausoleums are retirement homes for the rich, as the history of the rulers of ancient Egypt, the Pharaohs, with their gods, goddesses, and pyramids, such as that of Khufu  (see figure 7) of the 4^th dynasty, constructed c. 2600 B.C., at Giza on the outskirts of the modern Moslem capital city, Cairo, illustrate, which is what business and Christianity’s slave virus fights to possess. As the planks are fired, so the smarts are replaced with the wing tip collars of the vampire, because the battle for possession is taken into the skullrooms where, AIDS and SARS having made reluctant virgins, the bores bore until every mouse hole is possessed by the company of the bored.

Note

* From Middle English (M.E.) ‘cod’, scrotum; an often leather cup, and largely fashion accessory in the 15^th and 16^th centuries that, worn outwardly upon the front of the garment, enclosed the genitals for protection; similar in intent to the modern athlete’s jockstrap, which is worn beneath external clothing.

Works Cited

1 Suellentrop, Chris ‘How Did the U.S. Get A Naval Base in Cuba?’, Slate, ‘News and Politics’, January 18^th, 2002, 5. 25 pm, https://www.news-and-politics/2002/01/how-did-the-u-s-get-a-naval-base-in-cuba.html .

2 Styne,  Jule, (music), and Leo Robin (lyrics) ‘Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend’(1949), Monroe, Marilyn as Lorelei Lee in Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, 20^th Century Fox, 1953.

3 Nicol, Mark, and David Williams ‘Abandoned: Teachers who gave English classes and promoted  UK values too across Afghanistan now live in fear of the Taliban’, Mailonline, August 12^th, 2021, 12.27 am, https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9885565/Abandoned-Teachers-gave-English-classes-Afghanistan-live-fear-Taliban.html .

4 Kahl, Milt, original cartoonist and voice, ‘Ferdinand the Bull’, Walt Disney Productions, Academy Award for Best Animated Short Film, 1938; guest Ferdinand The Bull appearance, Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, Amblin Entertainment, 1988; computer generated feature length animation, Ferdinand The Bull, Blue Sky Studios, Inc., 2017.

5 Daniels, Charlie ‘Uneasy Rider’, Charlie Daniels Band, Honey in the Rock, Kama Sutra, 1973.

6 Berendt, Joanna, and Nicholas Kulish ‘Polish Ex-Official Charged With Aiding CIA’, New York Times, March 27^th, 2012, https://nytimes.com/2012/13/28/world/europe/polish-ex-official-charged-with-aiding-cia.html .

7 Freleng, Friz, original Porky Pig cartoonist, redesigned by Frank Tashlin and Tex Avery for Warner Bros. Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies, ‘I Haven’t Got A Hat’, etc., 1935-.

8 Smith, Paul J., original Chilly Willy cartoonist, redesigned by Tex Avery for Walter Lantz Productions, ‘Chilly Willy’, etc., 1953-.

9 Lenovo, StoryHub, ‘Smart Technology Helps Control City Traffic’, October 29^th, 2019, https://news.lenovo.com/smart-technology-helps-control-city-traffic/ .

10 Udin, Efe ‘Lenovo Group’s First Batch of IT Equipment Arrives at Wuhan’, https://www.gizchina.com/2020/01/28/lenovo-groups-first-batch-of-it-equipment-arrives-at-wuhan/ , January 28^th, 2020.

11 Leach, Edmund Ronald Claude Lévi-Strauss, ‘Oysters, Smoked Salmon, and Stilton Cheese’, Penguin, London, 1970, Ch. 2, p. 19.

IT Came From Outer Space

English language teachers, who began an overseas odyssey in the early 1990s, were already perhaps familiar with the boon and blessing of the magic of what then passed for modern technology in the age of the computer. However, the advent of the PCT, that is, personal computer terminal, suggested that IT represented an artificial intelligence (AI) with interests other than the health of the human. IT is Information Technology, and the PC humanity's heart monitor. Where PC is interpretable as ‘policeman’, PC is cancer, and our terminal relationship with IT tells us how much time we have left.

 In mythic terms, the development of what came to be called Bluetooth, since the initiation of research into ‘short link’ radio technology by Nils Rydbeck, chief technology officer (CTO) in 1987 of ‘phone company Mobile Ericsson, Lund, Sweden, was IT with the teeth of a vampire. If IT sank its teeth into you, you might live. Bluetooth was actually named for Harald Bluetooth, king of Denmark and Norway (c. 958 - c. 986), who united disparate Scandinavian tribes, so it’s symbolic of unified communications protocols, that is, ostensibly incompatible connections made compatible through wireless; represented by an ancient Nordic rune combination of Harald Bluetooth's initials (see Figure 1).

 Vikings invaded England in 1066 by sea, but that king, Harald Hardrada of Norway, that is, Harald III, was defeated at the battle of Stamford Bridge, East Yorkshire, on September 25^th. However, England's victorious king, Harold I, was defeated a short while later by another invading French army, led by William of Normandy, which landed at Pevensey on the South coast on September 28^th. After a forced march by Harold I's army to Hastings, East Sussex, the English were defeated on October 14^th, and William of Normandy, known as 'the conqueror', became William I of England.

 While the Vikings, who continued to raid England from the sea, became a byword for rapine, looting, war and death, the new aristocracy from France began enriching the English language with its words, for example, blonde (blond) reason (raison) and favourite (favorite) derive from French.* Consequently, although celebrated in the two part book, The Long Ships (1941-5), by  Sweden’s Frans G. Bengtsson, and made into a 1964 movie, starring American actor, Richard Widmark, Harald Bluetooth's 10^th century Viking symbolism is a two-edged sword. Those with the technology have the tools to continue, whereas those who don’t fall by the wayside.

Fig.1

 Who amongst us hasn’t been asked, ‘Do you have a laptop?’ Completing my PhD in 1992, ‘Jungian Archetypes in the work of Robert A. Heinlein’, required me to have a PC/word processor, and so an Amstrad PCW 9512 was duly purchased, with LocoScript word processing software and a printer, so that the 100, 000 word, 612 page thesis, could be taken, as required, to be bound in Bradford, before being deemed an acceptable pass and consigned to gather dust on a shelf at Brynmor Jones Library, Hull University. Familiar with url hypertext protocols and the internet information superhighway that is the world wide web (WWW), when trained as an ELT professional at a government sponsored course run by private company provider, European Training and Communications, Etc., Etc., and supervised by the TESOL Certificate awarders, Trinity College London, it wasn’t that long before a laptop was deemed an essential adjunct, subsequent to a spell of chalk and blackboard teaching as a lecturer in literature in English at Debrecen University, and its Center for English Teacher Training (CETT), Hungary, where the Soviet Russian pull out in 1989, following Russia's refusal to withdraw from Eastern Europe's formerly independent nations, consequent to the defeat of Adolf Hitler's Nazi Germany in World War II (1939-45), had left a distrust of foreigners, so virulent amongst the former Union of Soviet Socialist Republics' (CCCP) satellite slave states, including East Germany, that advanced technology was a board pin to us.

 English language teachers, bored and smart, went in droves to Eastern Europe, looking for some smart bored to educate, and with former Conservative Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher’s words ringing in their rears, ‘On yer bike!’ In Hungary, the average monthly wage in 1995 was equivalent to what could be had on the dole then in the UK. Later, however, the choice for new teachers became 3,000 US $ in the Middle East per month, and accept the equivalent of castration teaching an all-male audience, or 1,000 US $ in Eastern Europe, as the former Soviet bloc's economies were held to keep pace by the Western Europeans, led by France and reunified Germany since 1990, where 1,000 Euros a month was normative in terms of ELT salary expectations.

 As England’s teaching exports - and others - learnt the requirements of IT’s system, the telecommunications companies’ developing of the smartphone and tablet - and a Lenovo Yoga 3.8 Marshmallow Lollipop stays by my side constantly - helped bridge the gulf between overhead projector (OHP), smartboard, and bored, as the dongle affording male-female HDMI, DVI, and VGA penetration, through USB port connectors, promoted the transference of visuals from tablet to smart board screen, so facilitating the teacher-student interface.

 When the severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) virus 2 variant finally became virulent enough to kill millions across the globe, after its discovery in December 2019 at a Wuhan city hospital, Hubei Province, China, teachers yet unfamiliar were introduced to Blackboard, and similar software, to facilitate distance learning, with students sitting at home in front of their computer screens, as the ELT pros sat in front of theirs, instructing on how to learn during the pandemic. Caught in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, it was a UK government arranged rescue flight to London that permitted of my escaping IT’s engineers.

 That overcrowded schools, and other learning environments, contributed to the coughin' is indubitably true, but IT's inability to improve on blackboard and chalk for the assassinated teacher overseas contributed to perceptions of unfairness, as lesson observations were made that resulted in criticism that teachers were unfit, and/or didn't fit. There were obvious parallels between IT's viruses and that of the coughin' fit, because disabled learning is equivalent to wasted years, that is, murder by degrees, if there’s no smart pen, so the screen has to be used with a wipeable marker board pen. IT, like a debilitating virus, could delay the progress of the smart bored, and/or PD (professional development) of a teacher, for years; until the coffin fit. Simply by IT indicating to local adminstrators that a VGA dongle was at present unattainable, it likely would remain out of reach of the educational establishment for the foreseeable future of the worn out foreigner.

Fig.2

 In Kyrgyzstan (see Figure 2), for example, at a Kadamjay city school, Batken region, founded in 1993 and named ‘Semetey’ after the son of the legendary hero, Manas (see Figure 3), in the poet Sayakbair Karalayev’s Epic of Manas, though equipped with a Lenovo laptop, the smartboard required an HDMI portal. The problem was resolved by the lyceum's IT expert obtaining a USB dongle with a feminine HDMI connection that could be plugged into the laptop to accept the male HDMI smartboard plug in, so facilitating the showing of Solutions Upper Intermediate - with audio - to the audience sitting expectorantly at their desks.

 However, aged 60, and pretty well near totally assassinated by IT years before, my gratitude in September 2021 was indeed wry, as the opening lines of the epic, originally part of an oral tradition, written down in the 18^th century, and detailing Manas' birth, came unbidden to my brain, troubled yet again by an all boys' school, this time in Asia:

‘A sound of screaming rang out, and everyone rushed

To see,

Was it a boy or girl?

When his mother saw Manas’ penis, she so glad

She swooned.’1

Fig.3

 Arriving at the capital city Bishkek's airport, named for Manas, the humble traveler isn't normally aware that ‘Manas’, translated literally, is ‘God' to the Kyrgyz. Taking a further plane to Osh city, lasting above an hour, after an eight hour flight from Ferenc Liszt airport, Ferihegy, Budapest, Hungary, there was a further two hour journey through the mountains by car, before those peaked fastnesses that would hem me in all around, and throughout the winter, became visible.

Fig.4

 If the SARS 2 coronavirus, emerging at the local hospital, not far from architects', Sasaki Associates, Inc., projected 15.3 billion RMB Lenovo Intelligent Valley R & D lakefront Campus (see Figure 4), Wuhan city, Hubei Province, China, didn't get me, IT would. Taking my modem to Budapest airport, with the sim that the bank would send a verification code to, if an attempt by me to pay a bill was queried by IT, check-in dented my progress by arguing that the Covid-19 Euro-passport, recording the second vaccination at Budapest's Szent Imre Egyetemi Oktatókórház (see Figure 5), that is (for native English speaking readers only), the Saint Imre University Research Hospital, was insufficient without evidence of a first vaccination, which meant my having to show evidence of it from a drop-in center in Falkirk, Stirlingshire, Scotland, and resulted in the loss/theft of the modem with the sim.

 IT had traveled at my side in a small bag containing my Lenovo tablet, which I continued to take in the hope of defeating the virus threat. However, as frantic fruitless efforts had been made to locate the official copy of the Scottish negative Covid-19 result, a large part of IT disappeared, along with half the written life of the journalist; encrypted onto a 64 GB Ultra Dual m3.0 flash drive with both micro-USB and 3.0 USB connectors, as well as bank card reader, which allowed the transfer of digitized cash to my bank account by inserting another's debit card.

 The journey to Kadamjay imperiled, nevertheless the requisite document was attained. However, with the airfare unrefundable to the donor, only a £50 DNA test sampling by PCR (polymerase chain reaction) was now deemed sufficient to pay the ferryman and get me across the Styx to escape from Hades:

‘I would rather follow the plow as thrall to another

Man, one with no land allotted to him and not much to live on,

Than be a king over all the perished dead.’2

Fig.5

 Unfortunately, without the sim in the modem for my bank to send a verification code to, if the electricity bill was to be paid, the company would cut me off, like Greek Achilles' soul protestingly to compatriot Odysseus, after his death in the war against Troy in Asia Minor to restore Helen, abducted by the Trojan Prince Paris, to her husband Menelaus, brother of king Agamemnon of Sparta. In the gloomy despair of lightless Hades, actually pronounced ‘AIDS’, and indeed written so by the Greeks, Áïdēs, the job of killing me would now be divided equally between IT, and the more officially recognizable variant of its plague virus.

 Jesus said, ‘A prophet is not without honor except in his own town, among his relatives and in his own home.’ (Mk: 6. 4) Persuading boys to put their hands over their mouths to prevent the coughin' virus from spreading is similarly remindful, 'How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child.’3 The student, his back turned, can't see the teeth of the virus emerging from the coffin. It's part of the responsibility of the teacher to make their charges more aware; despite the corers of the apples of their parents’ eyes desire to hack. IT's more helpful than it used to be, but the damage to health and longevity is already done, as England’s foremost dramatist William Shakespeare’s mad king, Lear, evinces in the 1606 play, and so the verdict from the head is, 'Could have done better.’ With modern and up to the minute facilities, lives could be enriched and extended, or even saved perhaps, in the classroom; as elsewhere.

Note

* Acceptance by the English of rich linguistic influxes from other sources is the reason why American English, which didn't begin even to be written until after Shakespeare, and didn't actually represent the language of a nation until the 19^th century, after the American War of Independence (1775-1783) from George III's British Empire, and finally won in 1815, as agreed at the signing of the Treaty of Ghent, Belgium, ratified on February 17^th in Washington D.C., after the Second American War of Independence (1812-), can never supplant England's English. As the history of French Canada illustrates, the English language isn't America's, but rather France's, which doesn't accept linguistic contamination from others. While Americans can't rid themselves of their French, England's acceptance of it is what makes English theirs.

Bibliography

1 Manas (transl. Walter May), Rarity, Bishkek, 2004.

2 Homer Odyssey, c. 8^th century, Bk 11, l. 488-91.

3 Shakespeare, William King Lear, 1608, Act I, Scene iv.

Fricative, ‘Plosive (Voiced and Unvoiced), Nasal, and Approximant Consonants in English Language Teaching

When teaching ‘Presentation’, a form of EAP (English for Academic Purposes) offered by institutions to government clients, who want to ensure that their employees are able to present their point of view to English speaking foreigners, the ELT professional invariably encounters the problem of explaining how it is that the English pronunciation of ‘the’ (θ) and ‘three’ (ð) sounds differently to the ear, so are notated differently in the international phonetic alphabet (IPA), although either are fricative consonants, or ‘spirants’, that is, the two sounds comprising ‘th’ are made by the friction of breath in a narrow opening (see Figure 1), as f/th/v/h/sh/s/z, and ʤ, which is the phonetic symbol for the sound used in the pronunciation of ‘jam’, for example, and in the name, Jonah.

Fig. 1 Articulation

 It was the science fiction writer, Frank Herbert, who developed the concept of voice in his novel, Dune (1965), which was about a planet called Arrakis, a desert world whose people, the Fremen, relied heavily on their knowledge of the use of sound for survival. For example, the Fremen employed a device to make rhythmic sounds upon the surface of the sand of the desert to call worms, that is, giant creatures resembling the sandworms of Earth, which the Fremen then harnessed to ride across the desert, as a simple and convenient means of transporting themselves, from one place to another.

 In Dune Herbert describes the Bene Gesserit witches’ training in ‘Voice’, a means of issuing commands on a subconscious level, so that others can’t resist being compelled to obedience. Gesserit Voice can be strong enough to force physical action, and even paralysis, in the subject. Voice can be subtly employed in any manner of conversation, public speaking, or debate; to soothe, convince, persuade, influence, and otherwise enhance the spoken word. If the target understands what the Voice is, and how it works, and is aware that it’s being used, it may be resisted. Voice is useless against targets who cannot hear, and in English language teaching the voice of the teacher is useless with those who don’t want to understand the ‘target language’. Moreover, the native speaker of English would be resistant to Voice if it were used upon them, because they can’t understand the language of the desert peoples of the planet Earth’s Middle East region. However, a ‘Weirding Module’ (see Figure 2) is a sonic weapon introduced in and specific to Dune, the 1984 film adaptation directed by David Lynch, which translates specific sounds into attacks of varying potency.

Fig. 2 Weirding module

 The leading family on Arrakis is House Atreides, and its head, Paul Atreides, and his mother, ‘the Bene Gesserit witch’, Jessica, teach Voice to their Fremen army, ‘My own name is a killing word.’1 In fact the Fremen shout the name by which Paul Atreides is known by them as a battle cry, ‘Muad’Dib!’ (see Figure 3) Moreover, Paul’s name is a trigger for the Weirding Module, that is, the sound weapon that the Fremen are instructed in the use of by the Gesserit Voice teachers as a part of their ‘Weirding Way’. Consequently, for Arabian students who’ve seen the subsequent TV series, Dune (2000-), and who identify themselves with the science fictional characters, the Bene Gesserit witches’ advice to the desert dwelling Fremen is sociopathic, ‘… you will be able [to] paralyze …. an enemy or burst his organs.'2

 Because of the language barrier, forcing the ELT professional to shut up, and have their organs explode, is a matter for the students’ understanding that Voice won’t work on those who can hear, but can’t understand their language of Arabic, for example; so it’s only necessary to use ‘plosive consonants’. Also known as occlusives, or simply ‘a stop’, the sounds of pulmonic consonants, p/t/k (voiceless ‘plosives), and /b/d, and g (voiced ‘plosives), are made when the vocal tract is blocked, so that all airflow ceases. In order to slave drive the teacher, and give him/her a heart attack, so that all airflow ceases, if he/she shows any resistance to the coffin prepared, it’s only necessary for the students to deploy the ‘plosive consonants of coughing, and sneezing, that is, nasal consonants, n, m, and the IPA ŋ (-ng), to inflict symptoms of systemic inflammatory response syndrome (SIRS); the body’s response to infectious or noninfectious ‘insult’.

 Although approximant consonants, produced by narrowing, but not blocking the vocal tract, as by bringing two parts of the mouth closer, for example; the tongue and the roof of the mouth, as in the sound for ‘l’ in ‘like’, ‘r’ in ‘right’, and semivowels, as ‘y’ in ‘yes’ and ‘w’ in ‘wet’, are indicated as better sounds from the point of view of the instructor of English language to foreigners, so to avoid heart attacks and SIRS illnesses, they don’t produce English speakers, but approximations, which is the trade off compromise arrived at between teachers, who want to breathe and live, and students who sometimes don’t want to learn.

Fig. 3 ‘Muad’Dib!’

 Director David Lynch’s Weirding Module wasn’t a sound weapon derived from Frank Herbert’s 1965 novel, Dune, although the device is a part of the science fictional armory available to the Fremen in Part One of director Denis Velleneuve’s 2020 film version of the 1965 novel. In Lynch’s 1984 movie the Weirding Module weapon system came in two pieces: the throat microphone and a gun-like device held in front of the mouth for the ELT student to cough in; for example, so producing the ’plosive consonants of a directed energy weapon (DEW). Sounds from the Weirding Module of Dune actually do cause explosions in the sense that the directed sound causes buildings to crumble and other structures; for example, human bodies, to crumple and collapse. For students who don’t like school, and for teachers who have to teach, it isn’t science fiction. Making the ELT professional ill enough to remove them from their post is a students’ activity that isn’t indicated as being an aspect of the teacher’s expected impotence in dealing with the curricula when the supposedly lucrative contract is signed to take them into the war zones of the Middle East where Westerners are often the target of terrorism. The premise of Dune is that Shaddam IV persuades the Atreides’ arch-rival, House Harkonnen, to attack House Atredies because it’s become too popular for the emperor to ignore it as a threat to his rule, ‘We will kill until no Harkonnen breathes Arrakeen air!’ In the Middle East where Saddam I of Iraq was deposed by the invading US army in March 2003, terrorist acts against Western workers are routine, and teachers, perceived as merely ‘talking heads’ (see Figure 4), are a ‘soft target’.

Fig. 4 Talking head

 According to a designer of the science fiction world of the 1984 Dune movie, artist Ron Miller, the idea of death being a cough in sound had been the subject of US’ scientific research for at least a generation, ‘… inspired in large part by the old childhood trick of making a vortex cannon from an old oatmeal box.’2 Miller explains that there isn’t any escape, for those who don’t want to get into the cough-in-box, that is, the Fremen weapon hand-held in front of the ‘plosive consonants emitted from their throat-mike implantations. ‘Uroshnor’, for example, is an example of a killing word/sound directed at the mind and body of the Harkonnen target, which contained ‘… energy that generated the lethal sound.’ Of course, Dune is science fiction, which suggests that a cough-in-box is sufficient to kill in reality, ‘Chuksa!’ Should the classroom terrorist wish to inflict a heart attack upon the native English language speaker visiting Baghdad, that is, to improve the lot of the war torn: ‘Bless you!’
 

1 MacLachlan, Kyle as Paul Atreides in Dune, Dino De Laurentiis Corporation, 1984.

2 Future War Stories, https://futurewarstories.blogspot.com/2019/02/the-weapons-of-sci-fi-weirding-modules.html .

Thunking In English

Introduction

Ethnicity mightn`t seem important in terms of language learning, but the absence of bars and alcohol in Arabia is useful in terms of language learning, because the scope of what can be read, or listened to, reflects upon what is spoken and written, that is, linguistic adeptness is restricted to within specific socio-cultural parameters of acceptability, which determine what is useful for students to learn in terms of linguistic expression and, though reductive, that`s helpful in second language acquisition and teaching.

The focus will be on the problems learners have with tense, and specifically the present perfect and past simple; for example, in distinguishing the differences. Meaning, use and forms of these tenses are discussed in relation to non-native speakers of a particular language background. The appropriacy of methods of teaching the present perfect, and past simple tenses for different levels of language learners, is examined, with a view to showing how the teaching of these tenses is important in helping students` productive and receptive recognition.

Form

 Form isn`t so much of a problem for students, because grammar structures can always be learned. What is difficult for learners is to think in terms of time, that is, the temporal location of events. Consequently, English language teachers have found that narrative structure is the best means of helping learners to use tense appropriately, because that requires students to think in temporal terms and apply the grammatical structures that they have learned in a communicative context, which is the aim of the productive writer and speaker, after the reading or listening recognition; if they have something of their own to communicate: `In addition to his published writing, Benjamin Zephaniah has produced (1) numerous music recordings, including `Us and `Dem` (1990) and `Belly of de Beast` (1996), and has also appeared as an actor in several television and film productions, including appearing as Moses in the film `Farendj` (1990). His first television play, `Dread Poets Society`,  was first screened (2) by the BBC in 1991.` (Parrot, p. 240) The past simple is a `time anchor`, for example, that is, the productive writer/speaker (if the material is couched as audio) is communicating to the recogniiton of the reader and/or listener the information that some, or all of what they`re imparting as a communication, is located temporally in the past.

Use

 Simple past is a definite concept, that is, it`s simply what`s past, whereas present perfect is used to describe a completed action in a sequence. In short, in the past form of the verb (ending -ed) `work` becomes `worked`, while an irregular verb `sit` becomes `sat`, and the present perfect employs the present form, have/has,  along with the past participle, for example, `I have sat in the theater for two hours ...` The difficulty for students is that the completed action in the past suggests to them an end, rather than a  sequential part of a longer narrative, for example, `He has sat in the theater for two hours, because it`s raining.` The narrative sequence of recognition suggests that the completed action is to be followed by a further sequence of activities, which will involve the person leaving the theater, after the rain has stopped, and possibly several more sequential acts before the narrative concludes, which is most helpful for students to practice productively as it inculcates sequential temporal thinking in grammatical terms.

Meaning

 Encouraging students to productively narrate, either written or orally, assists their use of grammatical structure, because they learn through recognition what`s apposite. Although learners avoid using grammar they aren`t confident with, that can benefit a teacher, who can give the simplified rules as a `best guide`, and it doesn`t impair linguistic competence. There are linguistic analysts that would argue that a full grammatic knowledge is consistent with best cognition, but that`s a psychologist`s field of expertise, whereas the English language teaching (ELT) professional is concerned only with linguistic competence. Or, in other words, there are levels of grammatical structure that may be important for first language learners, because it`s a part of their growing cognitive capacity, whereas second language learners already have a developed cognitive awareness, so not all of the grammar needs to be inculcated as essential, but only that which is contributive to productive expression. Rosemary Aitken isolates two main problems with the formation of the present perfect: false patterning; and phonic contractions. Irregularity in terms of pattern, for example, drink/drank/drunk, leads to such constructions as, `I have thunk`, (Aitken,  2002, p. 37), while cognitively unrecognized and so misrepeated phonics, for example, `He`s broken it,` produce `He is broken it.` Phonically the `-ed` ending may not be heard, so not reproduced in speech, that is, `Yesterday he walk to school.’ (Parrot, 2011, p. 245 Consequently, learners need both irregular past and past participle forms as items of vocabulary.

L2

 Ethnicity mightn`t seem important in terms of language learning, but the absence of bars and alcohol in Arabia is useful in terms of language learning, because the scope of what can be read, or listened to, reflects upon what is spoken and written, that is, linguistic adeptness is restricted to within specific socio-cultural parameters of acceptability, which determine what is useful for students to learn in terms of linguistic expression and, though reductive, that`s helpful in second language acquisition and teaching. Analogously, if there`s a gas cooker in the kitchen that is redundant because of a microwave, linguistically it isn`t necessary to express it, that is, without bars and alcohol, Moslems in Islam don`t need the linguistic apparatus associated with them, which facilitates second language acquisition in terms of linguistic competence, because it excludes what the culture sees as extraneous to the business of life.

 Although that may seem overly Spartan to Westerners,1 it does make the business of ELT easier, because there`s greater focus on linguistic competence, rather than those aspects of recognitive social interaction that, for Middle Easterners, haven`t legitimate relevance; for example, `Ere, doll! You want some bacon puttin` in yer sandwich; to go with that pint yer sittin` wiv?` Obviously, the pint she`s sitting with is being accused of being a few drops short of a drink, but it`s not of any socio-linguistic relevance to Middle Easterners, who`re thankfully bereft of such alcohol fueled interactions, and so more open to the inculcating of linguistic competence from the English language teaching profession. As a consequence, some few grammatical forms, usages, and meanings can be dispensed with, because ease, usefulness, and frequency of apposite applicability are of more importance than difficulty, for example, `He has got a car.` Though used in America as standard English usage, simplified English is easier with elementary students, `He has a car.` What the Americans mean is, `He has bought a car.` Or `He has brought a car.` Its linguisitc laziness and neither the students` recognition nor productivity, is helped with that as an explanation. Consequently, have/has got shouldn`t be taught in English English as the Americans teach it, that is, as a separate recognitive grammar structure, and probably not as a form of the present perfect until pre-intermediate level, where it`s used, but not so ubiquitously as an indication of possession, for example, `He has got married.`

 When teaching grammar to non-native speakers, it isn`t recognitively advisable to teach them that they`re inaccurate, because of their native language, for example, in German `harben` is `have`, but Germans use present simple, where English uses present perfect: `Ich wohne seit 1970 in Wien.` The literal translation from German into English is: `I live since 1970 in Vienna.` The usage of `since` indicates completion after 1970, whereas `for` indicates completion during a defined period (Cowan, p. 367): `Ich wohne seit 25 Jahren in Wien.` In English the literal translation is: `I live for 25 years in Vienna.` Knowing why the mistake is made in German, that is, defining the period of time without indicating completion, leads to explanations using the mistake to indicate what not to do, whereas it`s more useful in terms of productivity to avoid teaching an lementary  student their mistakes, and the ELT professional`s knowledge of the non-native speakers` language mightn`t suffice. So, although there`s a temptation after the beginner and elementary levels to communicate in the learners` language, it`s better that pre-intermediate, intermediate, and upper-intermediate students correct their mistakes before the advanced levels through learning only correct grammar, that is, completion is after 1970, so: `I have lived in Vienna since 1970.` Or alternatively, when teaching to any non-native speaker the correct grammar of the past perfect in which a finished event is described as having occurred during a defined period of time, and where completion occurs during the period described: `I have lived in Vienna for 25 years.`

 The observation that the present perfect is used to describe actions that will be repeated depend on a supposed `sixth sense`, which isn`t actualy present in the recognitive sense of the grammatical structure, for example, `Your wife has rung.` (Parrot, p. 242) Consequently, the common perception that there`s a difference with achieved completion is mystical: `I`ve finished painting the room.` (Parrot, p. 242) I might paint the room again, and my wife mightn`t ring again. The notion that the present perfect indicates probable recurrence depends on common perception arrived at through usage as to what is likely to transpire, which of course produces more elaborately productive sentence structure in terms of clarification, but recurrence isn`t an integral part of the grammar, for example, `Your wife has rung twice, so I expect she`ll ring again later.` It`s not a part of the grammar that the completion implies recurrence, but rather of the language used. Consequently, recognitive grammar tables are most useful in inculcating correct usage with elementary students, because structure is clear for the learner and productive mistakes are explicable as error (Aitken, p. 22).

 A further straightforward recognitive method is to use a board pin, a board, and a piece of elastic, which works with pre-intermediate refresher students and higher. The board pin represents the past, which is anchored, and the stretching of the elastic backwards from the pin is used to indicate what has transpired since/for a period of time before `now` (Aitken, 25), which is a point somewhere ahead of the anchoring board pin. Similarly, less and more complicated narrative structures using pictures can be used recognitively to elicit a productive narrative description from elementary and intermediate students in terms of what`s `now`; the past time anchor, and what transpired before then. The teacher explains and elicits by moving the elastic backwards from the past time anchor to indicate what`s transpired before that completion and forward from the anchoring board pin to indicate `now`, for example, 1970 is back in the 20th century which isn`t now.

Conclusion

 Although the student didn`t specify whether they were a non-native or a native speaker, this request for clarification on a present perfect issue, which appeared on the internet`s  English Language Learners Stack Exchange (Dant, October 17, 22: 53) is illuminative of problems learners have: "I failed to understand the difference between the two sentences mentioned below a) `My father has worked at this company for 35 years` and b) `My father worked at this company for 35 years`" The respondent, P. E. Dant, explicated: "`My father has worked at this company for 35 years` suggests the work started 35 years ago, and continues to the present, whereas  `My father worked at this company for 35 years` tells us nothing about when the work began, but suggests it`s completed.`" Dant`s best advice is: `Don’t use the perfect unless you need it.` From a student`s point of view, it`s important to use the target language accurately, whereas nuance is fascinating to native speakers, which is the central problem for learners. Unnecessary overcomplication leads to obfuscation, confusion, and inability, that is, as the Americans colloquially say, `If it ain`t broke, don`t fix it.` (Lance) If students speak gramatically well, and use accurate grammatical structures productively, overelaboration based on fascination with nuance is recognitively counterproductive.

Notes

1 Slaves in warlike Sparta were killed en masse if their presence was deemed extraneous to Spartan necessity, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sparta .

References

Aitken, Rosemary Teaching Tenses, 2002, pp. 22-27.

Parrot, Martin `Present Perfect` in Grammar For English Language Teachers, Cambridge, Second Edition, Chapter 16, pp. 235-45.

Cowan, Ron `Tense And Aspect` in The Teacher`s Grammar Of English: Course Book and Reference Guide, Chapter 16, pp. 367-91.

Dant, P. E. `Problem With Present Perfect and Simple Past`, English Language Learners Stack Exchange, October 17, 22:53, https://ell.stackexchange.com/questions/106765/problem-with-present-perfect-and-simple-past .

Lance, Thomas Bertram, Director of President James Carter`s Office of Management and Budget, in the US Chamber of Commerce`s newsletter, Nation`s Business, May 1977, https://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/if-it-aint-broke-dont-fix-it.html .

Children with Special Educational Needs (SEN) in English Language Teaching

Contents:

Introduction

1. Language delay

1.1 Language difficulties

1.2 Rebooting

1.3 Specific delay

1.4 Lights, action

1.5 Motor function

1.6 Etiology

1.7 Coercion

2. Phonic and whole-language theory in specific reading retardation

2.1 Phonic theory

2.2 Phonic method

2.3 Boot failure

3. Intervention for dyslexia in early childhood

3.1 Paired reading

3.2 Time management

2.3 Active reading

Introduction

Cognitive development refers to the progressive and continuous growth of perception, memory, imagination, conceptualization, judgment, and reason; it is the intellectual counterpart of biological adaptation within the environment. Cognition also involves the mental activities of comprehending information and the processes of acquiring, organizing, remembering, and using knowledge, which is used for problem solving and bringing a paradigm to novel situations. A significant Swiss theorist in this area, Jean Piaget (1896-1980), saw the individual as an active participant in the learning process. New learning took place as the individual interacted. According to Piaget, cognitive development was based on four factors; maturation, physical experience, social interaction, and progress toward equilibrium, that is, death, and which was termed 'genetic epistemology'.

 Lois Bloom and Erin Tinker (2001) proposed a model for language development that suggested its emergence from complex developments in cognition, social-emotional development, and motor skills, which complimented Piaget’s suggestion that the child learnt by acting, that is, what begins as sensorimotor activity transformed into complex, abstract thought.

 For Piaget, cognitive or intellectual development is the process of restructuring knowledge, and begins from a particular way of thinking; based on what the child knows. With novel experience comes disquiet, that is, the need to resolve what s/he knows with what s/he doesn’t. Piaget called this process ‘adaptation’, that is, the integration of new information, although of course that remains dependent on the society’s dominant paradigm, which is wage slavery for brains that mustn’t reach independence to avoid the slaver’s loss of motorized slaves.

1. Language delay

There’s a distinction between secondary language delay (through intellectual disability, autism, hearing loss, or some other condition), and specific language delay, sub-classified as 'expressive', which is most common, and mixed receptive-expressive delay, which is most debilitating. Children with receptive delays only are rare, and it's of use to English language teachers to be aware of what might otherwise be understood only as the usual difficulties associated with second language acquisition (SLA).

1.1 Language difficulties

 Language difficulties may also be discerned in terms of phonology, semantics, syntax, pragmatics, and fluency. Phonological difficulties are manifested as inaccurate articulation of specific sounds; typically consonants rather than vowels. Posing the most difficulties are; r, l, f, v and s. Examples are omission, for instance 'ee' for 'sleep'; substitution; 'berry' for 'very', and cluster reduction; as in 'ream' for 'cream'. Where these reflect a preschooler’s difficulty in the motor skills required for correct articulation, the prognosis for language  development and reading skills remains good, and such children are indistinguishable from their peers by mid-childhood.

1.2 Rebooting

 However, with semantic difficulties, the child’s vocabulary is restricted, so only the meaning of a limited number of words, and their use in verbal communication, is understandable, which is also true of learners in SLA (second language acquisition). As that part of the brain, which 'boots' language learning ability in the child, atrophies in adulthood, it's 'rebooted' during English language learning activities, for example. Problems with syntax or grammar include restricted length of utterance and restricted diversity of utterance types, which is also true of beginners in SLA.

 Although by 2 years children are using multi-word utterances, those with specific language delays, characterized by syntactic difficulties, become slow to use multi-clausal sentences. If the same characteristic is observable in English language students engaged in SLA, it's likely symptomatic of problems originating with the 'bootloader', that is, adults, who've unknowingly overcome special educational needs (SEN) issues, or who're still engaged in dealing with learning difficulties, and exhibit the same symptoms as preschoolers, require additional stimulation to assist the brain in 'booting' the language learning centers that atrophy, and perhaps were never even fully operational.

 Problems with pragmatics occur where children are unable to use language, and/or gestures within particular relationships or contexts, to get their needs met and/or achieve communication goals. Up to age 2, integrating gesture with speech is a key pragmatic skill. In preschoolers up to age 5, such skills are used to tell coherent extended stories about events that happen. Although meaningful gesture, in imparting meaning through speech, differs locally, for example, shaking the head in Bulgarian means a decisive 'yes', and nodding the head means 'no', stuttering and cluttering are distinctive fluency problems in any and all cases.

 Cluttering is a too rapid rate of speech, and consequent breakdown, while stuttering is repetition, prolongation, and pauses disrupting the rhythmic flow of speech, which in children are indicative of learning difficulties, whereas among adults their appearance during SLA is perhaps also indicative of a student’s faulty 'bootloader', that is, the brain’s inability to upload the language learning faculties, which can devolve into undue criticism of the ELT professional; especially if the boot was originally flawed: or there only virtually.

1.3 Specific delay

 There’s a hierarchy of vulnerability in the components of language, which is affected in cases of specific delay. Children, whose symptoms improve, ascend this hierarchy; from the most vulnerable components of 'expressive phonology', then 'expressive syntax and morphology', to the least, that is, 'expressive semantics', then 'receptive language'.

 As a child with expressive semantic problems will develop expressive syntax and morphology problems, rather than receptive language problems, so an English language learner at the beginner level, or even more advanced, with problems in expressivity, could be suffering from the adult equivalent of ‘specific delay’ arising from brain atrophy, or originally damaged and unrepaired dysfunctionality arising at the left frontal lobe (Broca area), which French physician, Pierre Paul Broca (1861) discovered, and/or at the dominant cerebral hemisphere (Wernicke area). While its location fluctuates, depending on chirality (left or right-handedness), according to German physician, Carl Wernicke (1874), that is, left hemisphere in 95% of right handers, and 70% of left handers, the loading of language learning faculties occurs in these areas in nascent infancy.

1.4 Lights, action

 This hierarchy of vulnerability has led to the view that some etiological factors must be common to all language disorders. Moreover, there’s no doubt that some factors are specific to particular disorders. All language delays are more common in boys than girls, so gender-related biological factors are involved, that is, the desire to be a fertilizer, conflicting with the desire to process. Although a delay in the development of speeded fine-motor skills, rather than general clumsiness, characterizes most specific language delay, language and motor delay may reflect underlying neurological failure; finding expression in slow information-processing. In adult SLA, limited information-processing capacity translates as an inability to ‘reboot’ as a ‘film producer', where ‘action’ depends on new communicants.

1.5 Motor function

 Although genetic factors play a significant role in most secondary language delay, and in specific receptive-expressive language disorder, probably not in early specific expressive language delay. Otitis media, that is, middle-ear infection, at 12–18-months, precedes rapidly resolving specific expressive language delay at 2 years, and expressive language delay at 2 years is associated with problems in oral motor development.

 To develop the computing analogy further, as all programs have ‘drivers’, those that interfere with learning through the ears are ‘demon drivers’, which won’t want SLA; either for children or adults, because that would interfere with their first boot, and/or any subsequent boot potentially threatening to the slaver of the driven’s motor; including a reboot, which essentially is the freedom of the ‘route' that English language learning, and SLA per se, offers to the ‘learner driver’, who's used to having the gear shift on the left, for example, rather than the right, and wants to see if the grass really is greener on the other side; or is it just going past the mirror from the opposite direction?

1.6 Etiology

 It’s unlikely that psychosocial factors play a major etiological role in most cases of specific developmental language delay. However, they may maintain language problems. Low socio-economic status; large family size, and problematic parent-child interaction patterns, involving conduct problems, characterize many cases of language disorder.

 With severe disorder, conduct problems become worse. A variety of mechanisms may link psychosocial factors to language problems; frustration in the areas of communicating with others, or achieving valued goals, expressed as misconduct; difficulties controlling  conduct with self-admonishing 'inner speech', and poor parenting skills aligned with multiple stress, for example, large family size, and low socio-economic status, result in children and/or parents becoming trapped in coercive cycles of interaction, so preventing the development of language skills through engaging in positive verbal exchange. Although conduct and language problems are often expressive of such underlying neurological failure, it's the job of the teacher to give students, young and old, a collective ‘boot up'.

1.7 Coercion

 With specific expressive language disorder, preschool interventions don’t aid recovery rates; the result of maturing. Parents are advised not to coerce children to talk; but accept intervention. If there’s no improvement at 5 years, it’s possible those experiencing difficulties are involved in coercive cycles of interaction, so behavioral parent training is indicated.

 In cases of specific receptive-expressive, and secondary language disorders, referral for an individualized speech program; involvement of parents in home implementation aspects of the program, and placement of the child in a more conducive  environment, for example, at a language school, singly or in combination, are likely to result in more than positive short-term effects. Speech and language programs, that is, SLA courses, especially conducted in conjunction with home and school-based behavioral management, represent a real chance of taking the chequered flag ahead of the driven and the demons.

2. Phonic and whole-language theory in specific reading retardation

 Specific learning disabilities, as distinct from intellectual disability, that is, mental retardation, and specific language delays, are classified by reference to the specific skill in which deficits appear, for example, reading, spelling and writing. Phonic, and 'whole language theory', endeavor to explain the causes of 'specific reading retardation' or 'dyslexia'.

2.1 Phonic theory

 To read, according to 'phonic theory', children learn sounds associated with letters, and use these 'building blocks' to read and spell. The word 'cat' is built from three sounds associated with the letters 'c', 'a' and 't', for example. Contrastingly, in whole-language theory children learn to recognize whole words, rather than piece them together. Accordingly, the sound of unfamiliar words is learned by guessing from the context in which they occur, and getting teacher feedback. The child learns 'cat' sounds as it does, because the teacher reads the word to them under a picture, for example,  'The dog chased the cat.'

2.2 Phonic method

 Phonological theory gave rise to the 'phonic method' of teaching reading, which requires the child to learn corresponding sounds for each letter. However, whole-language theory also produced a variety of contextual teaching methods; for example, 'look-and-say', whereby  the child's taught to contextually recognize words. Although children use phonic-decoding, and whole-language contextual strategies, success remains dependent upon achieving a  developmental level of reading, while material cost, defrayed against benefit of accurate performance, remains the overriding issue for both adults and children; irrespective of boot failings.

2.3 Boot failure

 The theory of reading, which has received real credence, is based on children’s perception of rhyme and alliteration as the most important precursor of reading skills, for example, 'cat' permits of rhyming to assist with reading words; like mat, sat or pat, which involves awareness of similar sounds, that is, the phonological similarity of the rhyming words, and their orthographic similarity: how they're written. Children who develop the skills of recognizing phonological and orthographic similarities become good readers, whereas those with ‘boot failure’ develop reading problems.

3. Intervention for dyslexia in early childhood

Remediation programs for children with specific reading difficulties are based on a thorough assessment of their abilities and potential resources. With material increasing in difficulty as the child progresses, there should be a cumulative acquisition of reading and spelling skills. Training in reading passages of text, and the use of exercises to improve phonic awareness, for example, rhymes and alliteration, have better outcomes, in terms of teaching decoding and spelling skills, than do methods focusing on contextual cues and meaning-based strategies.

3.1 Paired reading

 Parental involvement, in brief periods of daily paired reading, is a highly effective preventative and treatment strategy. Parents, who're trained to simultaneously read with their children, can reach independence with them, and find mutual respect through shared participation in correcting original boots, and errors in rebooting. Error correction by a parent/adult modelling correct pronunciation is balanced by the silent parent/adult listening to the child reading unaided. If a child encounters error, the parent/adult models correct pronunciation. Multisensory approaches to spelling are effective, and simultaneous oral spelling particularly. Given a model word to copy, the child copies, and concurrently says each letter aloud; so visual, auditory and kinesthetic modalities are used simultaneously.

 After the adult/teacher’s checking, letter by letter, what has been written, against the modelled word, for three consecutive correct trials, the procedure is repeated, but then the model word is covered and written from memory. The procedure is followed with small groups of words, practiced for three consecutive days; until the spellings have been learned: coupled with a reward chart to maintain motivation.

3.2 Time management

 Adolescents may offset boot failings by developing good study skills; time management, active reading, and mapping. In time management, the three main skills are; making a calendar of time slots; chunking work material; prioritizing chunks; slotting them into the calendar at appropriate times, and troubleshooting when difficulties occur while implementing the study plan.

 Youngsters take account of whether they work best morning or evening; concentration span, which is 50 minutes for most teenagers, and work/leisure commitments. In chunking and prioritizing work, account should be taken of how much material is to be covered in a 50-minute slot; what topics can be studied for multiple consecutive periods, and which are best studied for a single period sandwiched in between other topics. When troubleshooting difficulties, the goal of the study plan has priority and, along with reinforcement, there’s need for leisure activities, construable for adolescents as rewards.

2.3 Active reading

 The routine extraction of meaning from texts, and the remembering of points as coherent knowledge structures, is ‘active reading'. Teachers facilitate scanning of the text by the student; note the headings, and read the overview and summary; if provided. After listing the main questions to be answered by a detailed reading of each section, and writing down the answers, the questions are re-read and the answers; then with the answers covered, the questions are asked again and the answers recited from memory. Reviewing the answers’ accuracy, teachers and/or students can draw out a visuo-spatial representation of the material to post on the wall, and/or by the web; a cognitive reference map to boot.

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